A little is alot

Well hi. Im 16 years old and im pretty much ur typical teenage girl. Texts alot. Dances. Shops. The whole deal. However, on the inside i dont feel so typical. When i was in 9th and 10th grade i was mentally abused by a boyfriend of 8 months. He was always assuring to me that i was nothing without him. And that i would be alot prettier if __. I even found a picture of a naked girl on his phone once.. But of course. I feel for his excuses everytime. His "im sorry i love you" got me hooked like a bad drug. However once my parents recused me from this disaster by ending our relationship because of how unhealthy it was. I moved on. Attempted to.. But hed always come to my lcker and kick my stuff down the hall. And a couple times he grabed my arms.. Forcefully. Eventually this all seized and i went on with my life. Altho.. Everytime i get a boyfriend i have my gaurd up.. Because when i was with austin(the bad boyfriend) hed pressure me into doing things with him.. If i didnt want to do anything.. Hed get on top of me. And being he plays football hes alot stronger. And i never thought hed hurt me.. But every time this happened he did. So with every boyfriend now. I always am afraid of being hurt and i take every little comment as a mean one. Even if it wasnt at all. Austin changed my life. For the absolute worse. Iv had boyfriends break up with me recently because theycant handle how afraid i am constantly. My current boyfriend understands my problem but im not sure he knows how to act with it. When he wants to do things and i say no ad get flustered he gets aggrivated bc i never say why im so nervous after he respects my no. I need support and advice becase at this rate im going nowhere

Oh precious Secret! I am so sorry for the pain and abuse you endured! You are so young still! Don't give up hope!
Teen years are so **** akward to begin with! Everyone says "I'd like to be a teenager again." Not me.
I had boys do the same stuff to me as Austin did. And it's not a pleasant thing to go through!
At least your boyfriend now has enough respect for you that when you say no he doesn't force you.
Having said that, if he does ever break up with you because you won't do "stuff" with him, it's ok. It's normal and you are fine without a boyfriend.
Don't be so eager to be in a relationship. You have your whole life ahead of you and plenty of time for finding someone who loves you for you and not what they can get from you. I was like that.
Right now you should be concentrating on your school work first. Have fun with your friends. And if your boyfriend fits into the picture and is respectful and good to you thats great too. Just don't be in a hurry!
If you do get into that situation again that someone is forcing themselves on you, then you need to let an adult know. Parent, teacher, doctor , school councelor, someone. Because NOBODY has the right to abuse you EVER!
If things work out with this guy, and you feel comfortable talking about it, explain what happened in the past. Tell him it was a horrible thing that happened to you and you are still dealing with it. Keep in mind, he may not understand too. You will find in life that there are many things people don't understand about one another because not all of us have been in the same situations.
But you have come here, to a place where people have had similar experiences and can understand what you are going through and can support you.
Please, if you want to talk further about this, share with me. I'd be more than glad to take you under my wing!
Many hugs to you Secret!
BD

Hi Secret me, Welcome to SupportGroups.com . I am so very sorry for what you went through with your old boyfriend. Remember that not everyone is alike. Have you sought counseling for help with your feelings? If not, then I suggest doing so. I feel counseling may be of help to you. BD is right in nobody has the right to abuse you and if you find yourself in a situation again tell an adult. Please keep sharing with us. It helps to talk. We are here for you. ((((hugs))))

Thank you so much. It helps to talk about it ans luckily i have a friend that i can talk to about things. However she doesnt always understand. And i have told my boyfriend the situation and he wants to kill austin lol but he knows hes not going to et involved. Besides its over now and the best thing i can do is start a healthy relationship. Thank you for the support and if i ever need advice or support i know where to look

I read you reply and I was a bit awe struck by what you wrote:
"best thing i can do is start a healthy relationship"

Girl, if I was that smart at 16 I would have saved myself alot of trouble! You should be very proud of yourself!

I wish you all the best.

And should you need us....we're always here.

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