A "Normal" Day

For those of you that consider yourself recovered, I have a question for you. What does a typical day look like for you?
I am a big fan of visualizations. I used them often when training for races but I'm interested in using visualization to help me in recovery. I think that if I can imagine what a normal day would be like, I will be able to create it. I know every day is different, so maybe write the most average day you can come up with. I literally draw a blank when I think about where I will end up. I think this is why I feel so stuck in recovery.

Hi Brittasully, thank you for being here and for sharing. I am a recovered bulimic and its been 15 years now. For me, it was shock therapy in that one day I had clumps and clumps of hair that came out in the shower when I was washing it and then my doctor telling me that I wouldn't be able to have children if I kept on this path. From that point on, it was cold turkey, though the overall recovery took time. It took time for me to develop a healthy eating plan that made me feel good about myself and my body, as well as a good exercise program. Once I got that in place, things took off for me. I'm healthier than I've ever been in my life (knock on wood), I love my body and have loved it for years, I am grateful for my health and well-being each and everyday. The key for me was health; the size and shape of my body became secondary. Once I got my health in order then I was able to exercise and feel good on the whole. I hope this helps a bit. Please let me know if you have any questions.

Thanks for responding! So you still follow a meal plan? I'm not sure I understood that part correctly. I understand the exercise aspect, moving my body in healthy ways without thinking about the calories burned. But when fully recovered, how does one eat? I get that you have to eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full, but how do we learn how to do that? I know I'm not alone in finding this idea overwhelming. What are the steps required to get to that point? And what do you do when someone offers you food that looks good? Does it change your whole day or go without recognition? Ugh I know that I could be asking a therapist these questions but for some reason I just haven't gotten there yet. Any guidance would be appreciated!

Britta, please ask me as many questions as you need answered. I am here to help you in any way that I can, though I am only speaking from my experience alone. It was really one day at a time with helpful guidance from my doctor. It was a lot of trial and error in terms of what made me feel good about eating. I have been eating 4-6 small meals per day everyday and I eat food that makes me feel good and healthy. The key is HEALTHY. It's all about health and well-being for me; therefore, I make sure that my meals are made up of protein and vegetables at a minimum, and I add in other healthy snacks such as almonds and fruits. It really was a one day at a time mentality, I didn't force myself to move at a fast pace. As well, if someone offers food that I know will not make me feel good or throw me off, then I politely decline. But, if it's something that looks good to you, then there's no reason that you shouldn't eat it, as long as it makes you feel good.

Does this answer your questions?

Yes thank you! I guess I am still keeping myself at the point of allowing myself to eat basically anything that I want. I no longer have any foods that I can't control myself around but I don't feel my best. I get heartburn and stomach aches as signs that I have not made the right choices. I have known for a little while now that I want to incorporate more whole foods into my diet. Now that I know I can have the "play foods" whenever I really want to they shouldn't have a hold on me anymore. When I ate whole foods in the past I was able to live somewhat normally with food. Meaning eating 3-4 times a day at regular intervals and not craving sugar or salt. I think I have been scared to make any changes because I'm afraid to be uncomfortable. I need to respect my body though so I will definitely experiment with more whole foods. Thanks for your insight, I really appreciate it!

Thanks, some useful info in this post :)

Mmmm... Britta, my most recent post, "Spinning in Circles..." might best illustrate a day in my life today... ♥ I still feel conflicted feelings, I am still saddened by the past, but I can feel and enjoy TODAY, too. :)

As far as food goes... I guess we all move through recovery differently... I still keep a careful eye on my MP, and sometimes count... I am still sometimes tempted to restrict, or compare my body, or slip back into the familiarity and comfort of my ED... But I don't. Because I know what that path brings, and I KNOW I'm better off now, AND I can feel the PROMISE and hope of tomorrow... ♥ So the temptation isn't strong enough to pull me off course. But I am vigillant. And determined. I have great hope in continuing this transition to recovery, and perhaps needing less vigillance in the future. ♥ THEN I will TRULY be recovered... :)

Love!

Jen

brita----i dont know if i can share with this one as i dont feel fully recovered 100% , you know? but can i visualize also, what i feel it will be like???

a day without an ED thought ( now i cant go 15 mintutes without one)

when i can look in the mirror and be happy with what i see ( now i see an obese person staring back at me.)

when i can feel ok with gaining some weight ( now i have gained some weight and consumed with punishing ED thoughts and self hateful thoughts.) i swear i almost thought of harming myself just cause i gained some weight for petes skae, now that cant be right.not at all.
so being totally recovered i wouldnt think of hating myself soo much even if i gained some weight...like now.

i ll be able to do anything in life and accomplish anything --and take the world by storm . ill beleive in my dream/ aspirations ( now ED is killing my dreams and goals)

ill be able to socialize with others without fear theyll think im fat... and worthless and stupid and such...
ill be confident with others...

ill be able to listen to my hunger pangs and listen to my body and eat when i want and know i met my caloric needs without trying to do tons of math and still wondering if i met my quota for the day.

ill be happy inside and out. ill be smiling without fear( (ED always says i have an ugly smile) so ill be able to smile..

i wont complain to my fiancee how fat i am and drive him craaaazy!!!!!

ill be happy with me unconditionally...

ill be strong, confident, goal oriented, social, witty, and not care what i look like casue i will know who i realy and truly am.

and that is what i feel recovered would mean to me. dang, ive got quite a ways to go , yet!!!!!!!!

love
maureen