Advice about overcoming guilt

Hey everyone,

I have run into a bit of a dilema. Im waiting to meet with a nutritionist and trainer to set up a meal plan so I can start gaining weight and moving the right direction towards recovery. We are meeting in just over a week and until then Im TRYING my hardest to eat more regularly and foods of substantive quality because I know that the meal plan is probably going to be alot more than I would usually eat and I want to sort of ease my way into it before I have to start it. Anyhow, Im having a bit of trouble. Im still eating healthy foods but Im eating them more often - having six small meals a day and Ive cut down by only going to the gym 3 instead of 4 times a week. Ive been doing this for several days now but its starting the play with my head a bit. By eating six small meals a day, Im eating when Im not actually hungry and its making me feel quite guilty even though the foods im eating are healthy. Does anyone have any suggestions about how I can silence those thoughts in my head so that I can keep going in the right direction until next week? When I will be on the meal plan it will still me up to ME to follow, but I think the difference is that because the meal plan is set my a proffessional who knows what theyre doing (as opposed to myself), then I will be able to justify following it. At the moment, by me CHOOSING to eat more and to eat when Im not hungry, I just feel like Im binging and end up feeling guilty and frustrated. Any advice about how to get through the next week?

Would be much appreciated :-)

I just remind myself that my food is my medicine- a diabetic has to take their medication to live and I have to eat to live. Or I think of it as fuel- a car will only move if it has gas in it so it is the same with me!

qtk, I do that, too! ♥ Food is my medicine and my meal plan dictates the right dosage. :) Simone, for a while you will have to eat when you're not hungry, which I know feels counter to everything you've been doing up to this point. But it is important for your healing. And it will not continue this way forever. Keep working hard, dear! You're doing great work! ♥

Love,

Jen

I agree- eating when you're not hungry sucks, especially if you are addicted to that empty/numb feeling, but if you keep treating your meals like your prescription over and over day after day, it begins to get better. And remember the 'slippery slope'- I never ever skip a meal no matter what because I know that skipping even one can send you on a downward spiral very quickly.

I can totally relate to how you are feeling. I am suppose to be eating more and gaining some weight back myself. So I am here to help support you. We'll support each other :) I was forced to terminate my membership with the gym so I can only exercise at home now.. It is hard but I knew it was something I had to do. I have not had my period for a long time now so they wanted me to stop exercising and try to get it back. I agree it is hard, and it is a struggle.

I try and tell the voices in my head "I need to do this to live, I need to do this to live" Every time I eat something,

I have tried writing down what I am eating, and when I eat it. That way, when I look at it, I can tell the ED voice that I am not eating too much, I am not eating foods that are unhealthy, and I am eating what my body needs to function. Also, it will give you the black and white facts of what you are actually eating. ED tends to take what you actually eat and make it more and more and more....it is all lies. You have to combat those lies with facts. That helped me when I was having similar problems eating more often than I felt hunger. :)

I learned something very important at weight watchers. You have a certain amount of points you need to stick to every day. For most of the members, the challenge is to not eat more tan their allotted points so they can lose weight. For a smaller percentage, they need to focus on their points value as a goal and make sure they don't come up short of their points because they are then starving their body. Keep ing a food journal and seeing your caloric requirement as a goal may help you feel more in control of your outcome. Remember... Any exercise will increase your caloric requirements. I know the guilt that comes from feeling like your eating more than you should, but sometimes you need to close your eyes, take a breath, and take that leap of faith. Your body will adjust to the new schedule and will thank you for it in the long run. (try to stay off of the scale during this transition).

I'm in the same place... I can't quiet the voice that is calling me an out of control pig. I have been in a place where I weighed more than "normal" and now I need to gain weight. In the past, with other episodes and stages of my eating disorder, I was fed via tube... And ended up binging my way to and past a healthy weight. My ED says, "It happened twice before...so watch out." I had a "BOOST PLUS" last night after committing to do so after a dietician appointment. It was torture... I still feel great fear and shame and guilt. I want to manipulate the "system" somehow so I don't have to drink those things anymore... I hate ED!

I also hate to eat when I'm not hungry, but that is the only way to survive an eating disorder. You need to get mad at the ED. It is not your friend and whtever it tells you is not true. I am anorexic and it has been very difficult. For a long time, I would not even admit to having an eating disorder. When I finally admitted it, I started my recovery process. I drink a Boost every morning for breakfast. I'm used to them now and it doesn't bother me to drink them. I just act like it is my medicine for the day. That way if my eating is not the best that day, I have at least some vitamins. I use to think Boost was torture also. I don't know what I weigh, but I don't seem to have gained weight. I know it is hard to overcome all the problems with an ED. You just have to take one day at a time. Good Luck to all of you!

survivor5