How do you live with ignorant family members?
I have flaws of my own, especially the most crucial: communication, but sometimes I feel I can’t improve when they’re the only ones I’m around. I’m trying to make friends though which is going okay so far, but I get confused. They tend to make me feel like I have a worse attitude than I really do, and they criticize me for being too sensitive when they’re completely insensitive.
Is this a parent child issue?
One is a parent, the other is a sibling who unfortunately takes after the parent.
Well right now I am dealing with a sister who doesn’t talk to me because well I don’t really know, but she did kind of accuse me of not telling her about my cousin’ s estate that I had nothing to do with, ugh. Family sucks sometimes, but my advice, take a break or be honest, only 2 ways to go.
I’m truly sorry to hear that and that’s not fair to anyone. Unfortunately I know a similar situation or being accused for something I really didn’t do.
And I appreciate the advice. I had actually done just that last night; I felt there were some things I needed to say and I feel much better. In short, my sibling and I had gotten into another fight and they, as I mentioned, dragged me for my emotions, but claimed they were a great communicator. I attempted to talk a little yesterday, but was met with a cold one word reply. Still holding a grudge a whole day afterwards. I wanted to cry, but then I became angry, so I confronted them and called them out. Of course, they denied it and twisted it back on me, but I feel so much more relieved. And ultimately, I think more space between us is better for now.
Man, I feel you. Mine got mad Thanksgiving 23, over what, still can’t figure out, she just unloaded on me. I was shocked and she kept at it and I cried. I was just so overwhelmed. Then I gave her space, then a really big event for my daughter came up, she flat out told me she was too busy to participate, but she attended, dressed so inappropriately, think very provocative, which has a time and place, not body shaming, but this was a teen’s party and didn’t say one word to me. I have tried to make peace. I have sent texts and a birthday present to my niece. So if you have any insight, I am all ears.
Inappropriate indeed.
Honestly it sounds like you still care for them as I do my sibling. I don’t want to completely cut ties so as I said, I’m just distancing myself for now and giving them time to cool off. Never have they been the one to approach first after an argument.
And your sister could be going through something maybe no one knows about. My parent had attitudes and bit my head off often some years ago and I never knew why, but turns out she had some financial troubles. Could’ve been something else as well, but that was the main issue. I would try speaking to her one last time; maybe see if you could get her to open up and if not, honestly what can you do?
I myself watched my family split down to only the immediate family members due to drama. If you’re not a fit, or unforgiving things were said or done, it’s okay to walk away. It sucks, but it’s real and it happens. We can’t get along with every single person that walks this earth, even if it turns out to be family too.
Also, maybe make it known it’s your final attempt to reach out and resolve things. That might be a little fearful to hear. And the reality of being alone might strike a chord. If not, again, she’s not worth the effort. But only you know what’s best for you or what you want to do. I wish you the absolute best though. c:
Thank you so much for understanding, yeah, she is my only sibling and it sucks. But I can’t fix something she won’t tell me how to fix. I have tried patience, kindness, waiting her out. Sometimes I think my family is just so toxic and I prune a little off at a time but the whole damn thing is rotten. It sucks!
I hate ultimatums, but you are right, maybe that is what is needed.
I’m in the same boat; they’re the only sibling I have as well.
And truthfully I agree; you’ve put in so much effort already but it’s unacknowledged and possibly slowly exhausting you too.
Exactly, thank you, I know it doesn’t solve anything, but having you understand means the world.
I’m glad to hear that. And thank you for commenting as well; it was a pleasure speaking with you. c: