Am I wrong? My STBX came over this morning to pick up my son

Am I wrong? My STBX came over this morning to pick up my son for his scheduled visitation and because I told him that my son was in his room he just heads back there on his own without asking. I was irritated and said "Seriously?!?" Not necessarily to my STBX, but just at the situation, but he heard me so walked back out to the living room to ask about what I said. I told him that I didn't think that he should just walk into my apartment like that (and it's not the first time he has done it) without asking, especially because he would never let me get away with doing that at his apartment. He seemed irritated that it should bother me, but asked if he could go to my son's room so I told him he could. A short time later my son said he was trying to find a toy that he wanted to take with him and it wasn't in the living room like I thought it would be so I told my son to wait there and I would go check my room. My son followed me and so did my STBX, who made a point of looking into my room to see what it looked like and made a point of making some snide comments about some of the furniture in my room. When we got back out to the living room I told him that I did not appreciate him walking around my apartment like he was free to go anywhere he wanted. He said that he was just trying to follow my son and I told him that didn't matter because he would never allow me to do that in his apartment, so what makes him think that he could just go wherever he wanted in mine. His response (and this is a word for word quote) "Because I have no respect for you."
The upsetting and hurtful comment aside, am I wrong to be irritated by the fact that he has, on more than one occasion, wandered around my apartment without asking if he can? I mean, I have never even seen my son's bedroom at his father's apartment (other than pictures that were posted online) and now my STBX has been in every single room in my apartment! Am I wrong to have been so irritated by it?

Omg my jaw dropped when I read your post. I would not allow him in the door any more period no matter what. Do you have any large friends who can be there when he comes to get your son for visitation. Often those types of men will back down if they know you have the right support.

@frog30117 Sadly I do not have any large (male or otherwise) friends and even if I did and that person was there I don’t think it would make much of a difference. And if that large friend was a guy my STBX would just accuse me of bringing all kinds of strange men home and around my son.

That's terrible. It brought back so many memories from my past hearing about your situation. It was a long time before I had friends or family even, who were willing to stick by me in situations like that, mainly because I was so comfortable being treated like a doormat. It's a change in identity to be single again. It will take time, but you will get through it.

You asked, and he gave his reply.

In the future, make him wait outside.

Turnabout is fair play.

This exchange escalated WAAAY beyond what needed to happen. In the future, have your son ready, have his toys ready, and greet your ex at the door to hand him his child. NEVER engage in ugly, snarky words in front of your kid. Take the high road NO MATTER WHAT your ex does or says. Your kid will thank you for it someday.

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