another dark day....who cares
I care. What's happening today?
1 Heart
Me too! I'm here! Are you ok?
What you should do is make a list of what is important to you and what you can let go of. Explain to your children that you're under stress, and that you're sorry, but ask if there are things they can do to help you out. Children do well with assigned tasks and can be a big help. It's easy for doctors to preach about getting healthy. They know nothing about where we are from or what we've been through. They see the outer shell, which, if you're like most of us, you put up a wall so nobody can peek in. You need to go back to painting and doing a little something for yourself. When children are cared for they don't need to be entertained every waking moment. You need you time!
When you think the husband isn't listening, stand in front of him and make eye contact when you speak (unless he is abusive, which you didn't state and there's a chance he would take a swing at you.) Ask for what you want and say what you don't like. And don't feel guilty for feeling that way.
I'm sorry for your injuries.
Get your paint supplies out. If you can't devote more than 10 minutes a day, do it for yourself. If you aren't in the mood, DO IT ANYWAY!
I feel for you. We're facing bankruptcy too and are nearly starving to death with the garnishments they're taking out of my husband's check each week. Then his doctor (Veterans Clinic worthless warm body) preached to him about his diet. I'll bet she doesn't have to live off $100-120 dollars worth of groceries a week! We can't afford gourmet food and expensive vegetables, etc. We have to eat cheap, canned vegetables and fruit, etc. I'm preaching to the choir so I'll shut up now. But I know what it is to not have any money or go anywhere.
Perhaps you can sell your paintings? I design crochet and sell items and it's a good way to turn your hobby into some spare and much needed money. Then maybe you can go out and do something fun with the family.
I wish you the best. It isn't pleasant now, but we have to tell ourselves, "It won't always be this way." Look forward to good times because there are still good times to be had, even if they're just little celebrations at home.