Hi everyone.. Oh man I had the worst night, I do not even like to go to bed because I dread mornings so bad. I have so much anxiety EVERY morning and it never changes. The anxiety and insecurity of meeting my children's needs to get them off in the morning, then the fact that I just set here all day and how pathetic I KNOW it is. I know that I need to get up and get stuff done but I just set here and watch tv and beat myself up over it yet I do nothing about it. I know what I need to do in my head but I just don't do it, I know how stupid that sounds but I am trying to be honest. I get to the point where I resent my parents for being good Grandparents...how screwed up is that! My parents live 5 minutes from us they are incredible people and I love them so much. THey are wonderful parents and grandparents but I totally am jealous and resentful towards them for how much better they parent my children. They are financially secure and to say the least we are not so their fridge is always packed with the fun stuff that the kids love, their house is always spotless they have a very set schedule so the kids just follow it and I know that it is more desireable for the kids to be around that and I always feel like I am competing with them when all they are doing is being good Grandparents. I drive myself crazy
Jealousy IS something that lies within & would be wise to take mental notes if need be from their parenting skills that would assist you in your life & in the long run would make everyones life run smoother, better & more uplifting so you get more rewards emotionally from your family.
Its easier to be a grandparent though cause one doesnt have to take care of everything & the needs of all 24/7, so can utilize that one on one time for the grandkids & make things extra special cause they have already raised their kids.
Take care of you.
April