i just came out three months ago. i'd love advise on how i go about meeting good people within the gay community. i don't know how to start out. i'm scared of labeling myself to fit in. i don't want to label myself in anyway. most times i say i'm just me. at times when i'm weak i'll label myself as sychotic. mostly to reassure people that i know i'm weird. i just really Really believe in Avatar.
i'm sick to death of all the labels we put on ourselves. imagine a world with no labels. complete freedom to grow change and truely be all you were ment to be. the freedom to be who you are. to take knowlege from where ever you wish. to develop a personality that pleases you, not how others view you.
i know i am a good woman with a good heart and all my life people have been telling me who i am and who i should be. the worst part is that i let them. so now i want freedom, freedom from all the ways i'm pressured to be. i have so much to offer. i am a decent kind sincere individual with many talents and many heart-felt emotions. i wanna be free to grow and change how i wish. to truely be myself before i waste away.
what advise would you give to The People of Pandora from the movie Avatar. know that they see all the deeper levels of life. knowing that they could see you, cause that's how i am. i wish i could shut myself.
in any event what advise would you give a youngin like me. i love advise.
I don't know where you live, and it's really none of my business, but do you have any lesbian bars in your area? I'm kind of in a different place than you. I'm a straight male who lives in St. Louis, and we have dozens of gay bars here in town, and at least 15 lesbian bars that I know about, so the ladies don't really have too much trouble meeting one another here. In addition, all of the colleges and universities have gay and lesbian organizations, and there are gay and lesbian business and professional groups all over the place. So really, the problem here is not meeting people, it's meeting the kind of people you're interested in, and that can be easily addressed by going to the groups or events where the folks you're interested in tend to congregate.
As far as being true to yourself goes, I think everybody deals with that at some point in life. It's a question of who am I really versus who have I tried to become in an effort to please other people. If you don't know who and what you are, what you stand for and believe in, how can you ever hope to get into an honest relationship? Now I realize this is just how things worked for me, but I took a number of interest and personality tests which gave me a very good idea of what was really me. And I discovered some interesting things. For one, I'm very intuitive, and that puts me at odds with most of the world, since very few people are intuitive (25% of the population). I'm also an introvert, which again puts me at odds with the rest of the world since only 25% of the population is introverted. When you figure these two factors together, only about 6% of the population is like me. No wonder I always felt so out of place!
Again, this is only what worked for me, but you might want to take a look at two (2) different personality inventories, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, and the Enneagram. Although they each approach things very differently, they should each come out with the same basic description of your personality, and they are both incredibly accurate. You can find all kinds of information about each of these instruments online, and after you've taken the test, check and see what occupations they suggest for you. Your personality will also determine your political and religious point of view, how you spend your money, where you go on vacation, etc. These things are really uncanny, but they are right on target almost every time. It's a good place to begin to figure out exactly who you really are. Just an idea for you to consider. Hope it helps. Good luck to you.
When i came out of the closet i continued to be me there is no labeling yourself if your just being you! i started seeing if there was any lesbian socials around n started going to them! i started making friends that were living the same life style as i and never knew i could have friendships like that! i would try it look for gay n lesbain bars, found that there are alot of lesbians in the area or atleast in the next town. just build those friendships. Once u got that ur on the road to new friendships! good luck hunni u can do it!