anyone have a clear explanation of how serial cheater differs from sex addict differs from bipolar hyper sexuality?
even though, my wife and I are at a very good place in R, and have both a hell of a lot of work and therapy, I still from time to time, go back to the "WHY?" ...looking for a medical or scientific explanation.
ive read lots of stuff on types of affairs..etc, but none of them really seem to fit like a glove for our story.
what does seem to fit our story, is bipolar
thing is multiple therapists ruled out sex addiction, and bipolar very early on post dday
Was he evaluated by an expert? It really takes someone who specializes in SA to know. I have a similar situation. His acting out was classic SA. His behavior in our marriage was classic SA. And he was sexually abused as a child which is true of 85% of SA's. Yet he swears his therapist (who is an expert) does not think he is a SA. Some days it kills me because everything single thing I read tells me differently as does my therapist. But then I remind myself that he is in treatment w someone really good, so for now it doesn't matter. And btw, I also suspect bipolar hypersexuality. Is your H in treatment?
One more thing - From my understanding, the difference is whether he used sex to change his mood or not. Whether he used it to lift himself out of depression, anxiety, whatever. As opposed to just the standard ego stroking high that cheaters want. Have you read Sex Addiction: The Partner’s Perspective? It really was good
Here are some links I found that I thought we very appropriate and enlightening to my wife's story
I also have found S-anon meetings to be incredibly helpful. I just started my 3rd year going to the s-anon meetings. it took me a few years to finally grasp the concept of this 12 step program, but I find it incredibly helpful
this first one, when I read it, was the one that I thought "wow...I wonder if this is what her experience was?"
when my wife read it, she said "yes...this is EXACTLY how it was"
@gettingintune thanks so much. Not sure why I didn’t see these earlier, but the notifications on this site are often iffy