Hello all. Recently figured out that I need some sort of escape. This was the first thing that came to mind. I figured out, after suppressing for a while, that I was bisexual around the age of 16-17. I have had a number of girlfriends, but no boyfriends or such at that point in time. Refused to act upon those feelings and urges. I, however met one guy. He appealed to all I was supposedly 'attracted' to both physically as well as personality-wise. To me it actually felt right and I felt comfortable. But I hid this for a while. Hid the talking. I was VERY discreet. My family is quite religious and frequently spoke of homosexuality and how they would react if a family member or a friend were to be homosexual. Lets just say it isn't the best reaction. I know for a fact, I would indeed be disowned. So I never told anyone in my family. I did however place my trust in friends... They know, and have proven to me how much of a family they can be to me. Am I wrong for doing this? Btw, i lived away from my family for 14 years, so I never built that relationship/connection with them. I was always an outsider. They always say I refuse to let them in on my life. This may be true, but I don't trust them. I feel soo guilty. But at the same time, I had to tell somebody, just not them. It's quite difficult being the outsider since 1. i am bisexual and 2. i don't have a connection with them. I honestly sometimes think of suicide or running away, hiding or something. Because at the end of the day, who can I count on? My friends are there, but I feel as though I'm a burden.... This is only the first of many problems, but I thought I should have said this one first :( any suggestions....or thoughts..?
soul searching
ok so the family arent very receptive to the things that are not within their remitt of lifestyles, thats fine for some people it just isnt a concept they wish to embrace or have any knowledge of and we have to respect the way they live life
its fine to have close relationships with friends rather than family at this time of life, u no longer live within the family sphere so its not hurting them in any way although i do hope that in the future u can broach the subject with them if it ever becomes appropriate to do so
u have no need to run away or commit suicide and u are not a burden to anyone we rely on our family and friends to be sounding boards and help us thru hard times/choices we made and your friends seem like a decent bunch of people who are more than happy to extend a helping hand
so what else is troubling u?
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
I'm on the same path as you. The only difference is that I came out and told my parents. I get called a lot of names like lesbian. If I'm not in a good mood they tell me it's because I haven't got laid. It's been terrible the only thing that's held me back from suicide is my friends. Sometimes you might think that your a burden, but thats what friends are for.
mici
so u told the folks and it didnt go well sometimes its hard for parents to put aside their dreams and hopes for their children, my son is gay and thats fine cos its whatever makes him happy but i have to admit i had moments when i looked at him and worried that he will never hold his child, know the joys of being a grandparent or just be bringing that special girl round for a family meal
well take it from me his partner is a fantastic person and my worries about his life were my burdens not his so he wont have a child of his own but he has nephews he adores and who adore him, the two of them take the boys out to do things just like he would if it was bf/gf so who was the silly one to fear things wouldnt happen for him thats right it was me, so like i said friends are great while parents/family are coming to terms with lost dreams
have a good day
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
I know it's just there so old fashion I wonder if I will ever make my parents proud
mici
of course u make your parents proud it just takes time to adjust the mind set, and be grateful they are oldfashioned it means they have the best for u at heart and thats all that counts they want u to reach every milestone u can
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
D
Again thanks for all the support you have given to me
mici
:D glad to help hon
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)