It has been a while since i posted anything. There has been a lot of things goin on in my life. I have felt great support from the site and then it was gone, mostly because i found myself living on the site and not taking enough time to realized i needed more work in my everyday life. It has been a real roller coaster in my life the past 6-9 months.
This addiction is so tough, everything is in my head and i struggle at times to get my head working better. It feels like i take 2 steps forward and the hit a wall going 60 mph. It just never ends. I have come to realize that the work will never end for myself, i will be an addict all of the days of my life, it will be that i have to fight every single day for myself.
what i have learned though is that i can work hard and i will survive, I will make mistakes and i will learn and work to avoid them in the future. I can be certain of the people standing by me today will be there in 1 month, 1 year or 10 years from now. But i a certain that over my life i will have people filter in and out. I am so very thankful for the supportive people i have in my life right now. It seems to be several that i lean on at times and it such a good thing.