Bulimia is serving a purpose ? ??

During my first apt. with my therapist today she said obviously Bulimia is serving "some purpose" in my life OR I wouldn't be doing it AND it wouldn't be so difficult to stop... I thought about that and determined she had a point!!

I wonder what purpose Bulimia is serving in my life (or yours) and how I can stop it.

If you have any insight - please share!!

Caroline

I dont think it so much serves a 'purpose' as much as it is a control factor.....

It s just ... for a while it makes us feeel so much better ! We hide behind it ! We take the easy way ... ED ED ED ! I am hungry today ... I go grab smth and I find myself binging ...- fact -

why :

- I was hungry because I didnt eat enough to the last meal
- I hate myself because I am hungry too soon

So I say I am a cow and greedy and I cant stop it because I love to eat so I binge !

Normally I should eat and think next time to eat smth more consistent !

the purpose of an ED then is to control something in our life?
it makes sense, when i feel out of control and everything around me is crazy, i want to control something, anything in my life. food is an easy thing to control. you can control how much goes in and if you feel you put too much it you can remove it. not good, but it helps when we feel we are out of control.
an idea is to find something else you can control and manipulate that makes you feel good when you are done to replace the food.
i use computers, crafts, painting, poetry. when i start feeling out of control and crazy in my life, i have learned to pick up one of my projects and start working on it. or play computer games. it doesn't always work, it sometimes makes it worse in the beginning, but if you stick through it, it gets better and you can replace the need to control food with something else. also if you don't get it right away, remember there is tomorrow (or maybe a few hours from then) to try it again. failure is only accomplished when we stop trying.
find something that you are okay at and enjoy doing. use something you want to improve at so you can get more enjoyment out of the accomplishment of success.
i have a calendar that i used daily when i first started recovery. every day i wrote one accomplishment and one thing i liked about myself before i went to bed on it. i would try to write something different for each day. it is hard and it takes work, but it gives you something to look at when you are feeling down.
something i do that may seem counter productive though it does work and help is i play a computer game based on making and preparing food. it sounds stupid, but the game is basically a series of mini games in which you make a dish of food. it is a great distraction and it gives me a sense of accomplishment when i beat the level at the highest score. i tend to repeat it until i get the best score i can. it is fun and challenging. it gives me the 'interaction' with food without touching it personally or feeling guilty afterward. i actually tend to feel proud that i beat a certain level or bested my score.

Scarlette