I would love some help and insight on long distance relationships and whether or not they can really work for the long-term? Has anyone had a successful relationship as such? And if so, would you mind sharing your story with me? Thank you so much in advance for your help.
I never had a long distance romantic relationship work. But I certainly have long lasting, long distance friendships that have endured years! I know you think the latter may not be what you want . . . but I have never felt more loved then when my male friend calls, writes or visits! We haven't been romantic for 15 years or so . . . yeah it started that way. But he is a much better friend to me than lover/partner. For that, I know I want someone near, a part of my daily life.
For you, I'd say you never know till you try. What's the harm if both adults are consenting? You don't know how it will turn out, plus we all learn something about ourselves with every relationship we enter into. Even if you end up with a friend, I don't think that's anything to scoff at!
lemmie know what you decide to do!
Caryn
I do think that relationship work if both people stay committed and there is open communication from both ends. My now boyfriend and I began a long distant relationship which last for 3 years until he moved closer to me. Just be honest with each other and make some time for yourselfs even if you can't see each other as offend as you wanted. In the end waiting for each other will make the love grow. Take care.
I personally have never been in a long distance relationship, but I have known couples who were.
One couple I knew met online a few years ago. They live in two different countries (though in the same geographical region) but they managed to make it work. Unfortunately, I'm not in touch with them anymore but the last I heard, they were planning to live together. They made a very sweet couple and they had visited each other several times in person.
Another couple I remember lived in the same US state but lived in the opposite ends of the state. One was already planning to move near where her girlfriend was for job opportunities, and as her girlfriend was already there she decided to move there not too long ago. They are still very happy with each other. Their one year anniversary is coming up soon.
And another couple (I seem to know a lot, don't I?) is about 5000 miles away from each other. One lives in America and another lives in the UK. A year and a half later, they're still going strong. One is going over to America to visit their girlfriend in August.
Long distance relationships can be extremely painful because you don't have that physical intimacy. But from my observations, they can also be very rewarding. It takes a lot of hard work from both sides, too. Communication is extremely crucial in long distance relationships. Some people can't do LDRs, and I can't say I blame them, because it is difficult.
I never personally had a long distance relationship & have heard some horror stories about how hard. However-I can share my cousin's story about her long distance relationship & it did have a very happy ending! My cousin Rachael met this wonderful man when she was in college (she was 20 he was 22). They had only been dating 3 months when he was stationed to Iraq ( her bf David was in the Army reserves & had to serve a 14 month tour of duty). At first they didn't know if they wanted to do long distance because they hadn't been dating long. However, they had such a connection & she felt so bad that he was going off to war-they tried it out. My cousin Rachael said it was difficult because she only got to talk to him once a week, they sent emails/wrote letter, and skyped when they could. She did say that they were always open & honest with each other so it did help to discuss how much they hated long distance, how they missed each other etc. I know she was never jealous-but David admitted to worrying if she was going to meet someone else etc-because she went on w. a normal 20 yr olds college life & even celebrated her 21 bday w/out him. They tried to keep good communication but it was difficult at times. They also tried to show each other how much they cared in that he would send the occassional random present for her; and she would send him numerous care packages,pictures, and even baked goods!. David did say that thinking about Rachael & what thw possible future w/ her helped him make it through some hard times at war. My cousin said they would discuss future plans but she was worried how things would be once he got home. They did have differences of opinions on certain matters in that david wanted to stay in military & Rachael didnt want to have to go through another deployment,; and Rachael didn;t want to live with him before marriage and David did. ANyway-when he got back in the states they continued to date. They had some minor disagreements but it was easier for them to communicate & discuss disagreements when they were physically together. They dated for 3 more years, both finished college/got jobs etc, and got married. Right now they have been married for 4 years & are very happy. David did continue in the military & actually was deployed again about a little over a year ago. Once again long distance was hard for them (esp since they had a 2 month old baby) but through good communication & trust in each other they were able to work things out & maintain a good relationship. According to my cousin, the only good thing about a long distance relationship is that you appreciate the time you are able to spend with you Significant Other more than you would if you were always with them! Best of luck on your new relationship!
I don't mind sharing, we were only about 8 hrs away but this was about 8 years ago and either of us had cell phones or computers, only land lines. So we talked about 2 times a week on the phone since calling cards were expensive for us. And when we did see each other by driving and staying together one full day because of the travel distance. I had a lot of family that did not support it but I just believed and trusted him. Please just stay positive.