its only been 1 month since my husband asked for a divorce and me and my 2 daughters moved out of our house into an apartment ive never done anything like this before but right now i feel so alone im desperate for help answers advice anything to try and make me feel a little better its so hard to get out of bed everyday but i know i have to for my kids my ex seems to be doing well and moving on already how is that???? i want to know things will get better and ill be ok anyone out there know what im talking about please let me know thanks
Hi Becky, I think that everything that you are feeling and going through is so normal, as you've had two very big life changes; divorce and your daughters moving out. Allow yourself to go through your emotions and feelings, and then work to heal and move forward in a positive way. Look at this as a beautiful new chapter in your life, where the opportunities are endless. Please know that we are here for you.
Thank you for your kind words. It has given me some hope. I just wish I knew how to begin to move forward. There’s part of me that does and part of me that doesn’t. That’s what makes it so hard. I’m so confused
hi becky i am in the same boat as you. it has been six weeks since my wife of six years took our three years old son and left. i am still hurting and confused. but there is light at the end of the tunnel. God will help and guide us to him. We will survive this. It is my son who has help me the most. I get to see him every weekend and he keeps me very busy. Yes the sadness and pain is still there. You just have to remind yourself that tomorrow will come and it will get better.
you do sound like your in the same boat as me just reversed thank you so much for your words and hearing it from someone going thru it now helps alot im doing a lot of praying and questioning why best of luck to you in all this and keep in touch maybe we can chat out our frustrations and help each other
Hi becky, You are not alone. I hope that helps a bit. but more importantly know that everything will get better. Unfortunately, it will take so time. it has been 4 yrs since my husband and i separated and where are still married. that has added more confusion to pain because it makes it difficult to move on, at least for me. My ex has moved on too and my daughter spends more time with them than she does with me and it kills me at times. but i had to get away from all the thinking about how or why this all happened and started asking god what was suppose to come from all this. and i found that i needed to go back to school and polish some of my gifts up and work on making me happy, instead of expecting my happiness to come from those i love and treasured. it sounds selfish, but as mother's, wives, caregivers, hosts, cooks, maids....we give up a lot of who we are. Even though being a mom and a wife was all i ever wanted to be, sometimes god wants more from us. So what do you like to do and havent could be a good start. I wish you all the best and know the road you are on is not easy or short, in time it will get better. i promise!! Oh!!! and dont think about how your ex- is moving on so easily and quickly, it wont help. just know men and women are different. we are more emotional and they are more mechanical. they deal by keeping on...god bless you and your girls.
thank you so much for your support and kind words they mean a lot some days i wonder how i am going to make it thru this and then wonder how i actually do deep down i want to be happy and move on but yet theres that other half that really just wants to feel sorry for myself which i know is wrong im so confused and have so many different feelings its hard to explain one day maybe ill be on here saying im happy and moving along in my life but for now i just need to take day by day thank you again
Becky, you are very brave for coming here & reaching out for advice, answers, all of us here will do our best to help guide you along the way as what you've endured takes everything in your strengths to achieve your ultimate goal of independence, peace & contentment. We're all here for you honey as you walk this road, when your feeling a little better do check out this site for answers to questions that sometimes get overlooked when one has so much on their shoulders: http://www.divorceinfo.com
Do your best to keep finding strength in yourself & family as they need & want you & I'm sure you will show them what is necessary & needs to be done for everyones emotional well being & long term goals. Dont be scared honey talk to us about it.
Take care of you friend.
April
thank you april its nice to know you have friends that understand what your going thru i have definetly found this site to be very helpful and open up about my feelings and actually have someone understand thank you so much for the support it means the world to me
Hi Becky,
You're not alone. If you feel as if you are losing your mind, its called "crazy time." Its the constant swirl of double-feelings.
Feeling like crap is part of the process. Its a long one. I'm not there yet but what awaits is worth the effort.
Love, Trust and Freedom.
;) Hang in there.....and don't be too hard on yourself.
thank you for your kind words i feel like its gonna be a long hard road some days are better than others though trying to be positive thank you again
i thought things would get easier with time although it hasnt been that long but i swear i feel worse than i did 2 months ago when we split im just so confused he tells me that this will be good for us and give us time to work on things while were apart and maybe it will bring us back together however in the meantime as i sit here holding onto hope and trying to do whatever it takes he has taken his new girlfriend away for the weekend but still texts me that he is thinking about me and loves me what the heck am i suppose to do i feel strong one day and like i can move forward and then something throws me back 100 feet and im miserable again i just dont know what to do anymore i have cried everyday for the past 2 months and i feel like im loosing my mind any suggestions please
Do your best to NOT respond his texts as this will only KEEP confusing YOU & for some reason he may be trying to keep knocking YOU off course (emotionally) by playing both sides of the fence for "JUST INCASE". DONT let HIM TAKE YOUR POWER AWAY FROM YOU by continuing to interact w/this type of behavior from HIM, DONT give him too much information about how your feeling, instead talk it out here w/others, I can only say by distancing yourself from the toxic mind games will be the only way to start being capable of thinking of YOURSELF over time & not the "WHAT IFs" about HIM anymore.