After alot of deliberation and through alot of anxiety, I have decided that Inpatient IS something that I just have to do. I have talked to several healthcare professionals in the last few days and everyone agrees that it is a dire need that I go to treatment SOMEWHERE.
I am not really sure when or where I will be going yet. I found an application and have decided to fill out a scholarship called the Manna Fund. They are offering a scholarship for up to $45,000 and they are wanting to send the recepient to a treatment facility only about four hours from where I live. The only thing is there are ALOT of people applying for the scholarship. But it is worth a shot.
After meeting with my counselor today we decided that I would reach out for people willing to donate the money for me to raise the funds to go to Remuda Ranch, or wherever else I can find to go. Over the next few days I will write up letters and send them to people from church and friends that me and my youth pastor think would be capable and willing to make a donation. I will also send messages out to friends on Facebook.
This is a HUGE thing for me. I hate asking people for help, especially financial help. And I have to do all of these things behind my mother's back for the time being, because I know if I tell her then I will be talked out of it. I know I will be going without the support of my family, but I know that this is something I have to do to save MY life.
Please be praying for me thought, because this is very very hard.
Kasee...I am relieved that you have made this decision. I know you have a lot of doubts about your Mom's opinion, but your life is truly at stake.
It is a GOOD thing that you are willing to ask for help! I hope that you can get the help you need. As always, let me know if I can help any on this end...HUGS...Jan ♥
Kasee, Honey, I'm proud of you.
I am so happy that you have decided your life is worth living, and that you are going to fight for it! I wish I had as much strength and courage as you... If I could give you money to help you I would!!
Thinking of you, hang in there!
Love,
CC
Kasee,
Good for you!! :) I'm glad you're willing to fight for your life, friend! Stay strong. You know what's best for you. Now is the time to ask. ♥
Love,
Jen
Kassee
I am absolutely proud SO proud of you.You are doing the best thing you could ever do for you.
PROUD:)
Love
this is incredible kasee, i say stand up for what YOU beleive in. this will save your life and just because your mom doesnt understand, she doesnt have to. this is your life. you NEED to get better, and when you are done with treatment then shell understand. im so glad you are stadning up for yourself , kasee.
this is wonderful!
love and prayers
maureen
Thanks everyone for your encouraging words and prayers. I know it is not going to be easy, AT ALL. but I am still pushing forward no matter what. and I know that when I am having doubts that I have people pushing me to keep going.
I meet with my doctor tomorrow about getting a letter of recommendation and also to talk to her about me maybe getting put on a mild anxiety medication to help a bit. I think it would make a difference. I am also going to be honest and tell her about the physical things that have been going on, the chest pains/heart palpitations, hair falling out...things like that.
I'm working on it guys! I really am trying!
Good to hear, Kasee! I look forward to hearing from you tomorrow. :) Ask for what you need, friend! ♥
Love you!
Jen
good for you Kasee mothers seem to think they no what right for us even when other say otherwise it so frustrating I think your doing the right thing i know what it like to have to go behind your mothers back i m going through something very similar to you me mom does not agree with me going to treatment she does not believe i have an eating disorder despite the fact i have been hospitalized and am being feed by a pic line talk about denial she has been very mean about it. so i made the decision to put myself first something that's very hard to do but necessary for me i have made the choice to not see or talk to my mother until i get stable something that despite the grief its causing me now i no it will be worth it in the long run. if i can put me first then so can you it not easy believe me my heart is broken over it but i think my life is more important the pleasing my mother and yours is too your doing the right thing :) haung in there good luck with getting the $$ for treatment you are in my thoghts and prayers lot of love and a huge and i m sure much needed hug
<3 leah