Don't know what else to do

I am kind of depressed right now. Last Thursday, I went on a field trip to Westpoint Military Base and my teacher told my mom on Back to School night that all of it was "accessible" but my guide said we had some extra time so he led us to the top of the hill with me leading and turned to me "Lad, I'm afraid you won't be able to go down there" in front of everyone. Nobody really talked to me on the bus (surprise) since almost everyone was on the upper floor of the double-decker bus and the wheelchair slot was on the lower deck. After the rest of the group was gone, I said to my aide while starting to cry "What did I ever do to anyone to deserve this life? What did I do to God? Was I a serial killer or something in my past life?". This is not the only thing that happened, I was removed from gym class in 9th grade because the school felt that my safety was in danger because I fell while playing football. My parents have been saying bad things about each other- they are at court over child support. I used to have a good life. In 3rd grade, many people invited me to parties, wanted me over to hang-out. My fourth grade teacher was very mean to me and I cried. I had an aide in 5th-8th grade that I became jealous of because he was popular with the students and that also separated me from my old friends. I told my aide that I wanted to commit suicide and so there will be an emergency PPT meeting next week. My mom is also going to have me see a psychiatrist and is hiring a guardian ad litum to see me. If that does not work, I honestly don't know what else to do.

Here is the thing, people are scared of what they don't know. My daughter is in kinder and is in an integrated deaf/hearing class, she is hearing, but honestly thinks her deaf teacher and two deaf classmates are the coolest things since sliced bread (I am dating myself using such corney expressions-but go with it). The school makes this huge effort to teach the kids that NO MATTER who you are, the color of your skin, your abilities, your background, it all doesn't matter, we are all the same. So, here is what you need to do, you have limitations, granted, but that doesn't mean that you should allow people to walk all over you. Next time you are on a field trip, pull up a map of the place, wheelchair accessibile routes are clearly marked, print it up and bring it with. So when a guide says you can't do something, say, "why not-it says right here I can, or fine I can go around this way and meet up with everyone."

Learn to speak up for yourself and you might be suprised with the results. Also, have you ever thought about a service dog, I know it is a huge responsibility, but it might be something to consider.


Thank You CKamma this really helped

From Neurological Disorders to Disabilities & Mobility