im 17 and a senior in highschool and i have had ed for the past 3 years. i've written here about 6 months ago. it first started out me just wanting to have a great body by working out and eeating healthy and than it got worse to me barley eating at all. After a few years i started bingeing like crazy and now im the heaviest ive been my whole life. i dont eat all day and than at night ill eat a huge amount of food till im stuffed. im on sports and love hanging out with friends and partying but i can never be who i reallllly am around them anymore cuz all im thinking about is ED. i need to go to some sort of treatment but i cant do it. the main problem is because my parents are so annoying with it. i no they could tell i have bad eating habits but there bad themsevles. My mom doesnt eat all day and will just have a salad and my dad eats too much. i just dont know what to do anymore. everytime i say im going to eat healthy and be normal i always screw up!! does anyone know any places i could maybe go to without telling them? or anything i could do on my own? im soo desprit!!! i dont want to go to college away like this next year :( its taken over my life !
hey nikki! welcome back!
have you ever considered talking to the school counselor or nurse for first point of contact? or maybe go talk to your family doctor?
how about checking any of the ED websites for groups nearby? EDA, NEDA, OA?
keep us updated!
love
maedi
no i havent do you know any websites maybe they could help me find something near by? thank you so much for your help.
and i have considered talking to people in my school it just doesnt seem to comfortable to me.
Nikki You are not alone in this fight. I understand not wanting your parents to know and Maedi has a very good suggestion to start with a school counselor. I took my first step with a college counselor and it did lead to the road I needed to be one just couldn't get there on my own. Please share more of your story if you feel comfortable on here, we are all here to support and be supported.
Hi Nikki welcome back...I second maedi and say speak to ur school nurse/coucelor. You may not feel comfortable but its the most easily accessable and readily available to you.
i know that talking about everything may be uncomfortable to begin with. but once you've done it the first time it will get easier i promise! could you maybe ask a friend to go with you, at least to the door (as daft as that may sound)?
here are some links:
http://www.aedweb.org//AM/Template.cfm?Section=Home
http://www.overeatersanonymous.de/
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/
http://www.anad.org/
love
maedi
Nikki,
Hi there, I remember you! ♥ I'm sorry you're struggling, but I'm glad that you're reaching out for help. These problems have a horrible way of progressing into even bigger problems until they're properly dealt with...
I think a meal plan would really help you. Not one for weight loss, but a good, well structured meal plan that will require you to eat good healthy food in appropriate portions at regular times throughout the day. The fact is, you're restricting during the day because of guilt over the previous night, and your restricting is causing you to eat more than you're comfortable with in the evenings. Bingeing is a hard addiction to break, but it is possible with help. :) Do you think you could ask your parents to help you see a nutritionist? One specialized in eating disorders? You can start with your school councelor, of course, but I do think you're going to need more specialized help with this...
Thinking of you! :)
Love,
Jen
Nikki....welcome! Everyone has offered some great support and possible resources. I agree that first speaking confidentialy with your counselor at school would be a good step. The most important thing is that you get help. Please check out support groups in your area, and consider that getting help could be the only way you can move on into your future in a healthy way. Thinking of you...Jan ♥
thank you jen your tottally right about everything and i know i need help and i need to do it soon before it gets way to out of control if it hasent already. I've seen a nutrtionsit before but she didnt make me feel comfortable what so ever. I think i need someone i could rely on and trust you know? And also i really dont want to go to my parents about this because its just another bill to pay. :(
do talk to the school counselor and see what they can recommend. tell them all your worries, as well about not wanting to confide in your parents and the financial aspects of therapy. it'll be your first step towards recovery!!
love
maedi
I agree you should try talking to a councilor at school. I've been bulimic for 5 years, and I talk to my councilor and she helped so much. The only problem is I moved and then I just didn't open up to anyone else after that.I wish I would of, don't give up talk to someone a bout it!!! Good Luck!!!
Kellie
Hey girl I'm new here too- I'm mainly struggling with substance abuse right now but I had a horrible ED before and I still sometimes catch myself looking at calories, etc. It's a constant battle. I know that you are capable of beating this ED though! You've taken the first step by admitting that you need help. I agree that maybe talking to a school counselor would help. Are there any meetings in your area? Even going to AA and just substituting 'ED' for 'alcohol' could help you- plus there are plenty of girls in AA who also have ED's who could help you. It would be great if you could get into a treatment center, but it sounds like your parents are unwilling to pay for it. At least you are almost 18 and can get out of there soon. It sounds like an unhealthy environment. I'm 24 now, and I've done much better since living on my own. Good luck girl.
I understand how you feel and I'm so sorry. Im about the same age as you and I can understand not wanting to tell your parents, Im trying to figure out how to tell mine. But you're not alone and you can talk to me anytime if you need help, or just want someone to talk to. :)
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