you know you're a loser when you request to be friends with someone on facebook that you havent even talked to but know from high school and they ignore your request but keep becoming friends with others. THAT'S bad! i really am a loser and a dork! omg. i have to accept this and not think that i will change - it's been almost 40 years now and i am having delusions of grandeur!!!! i really dont like myself AT ALL! its hard to when others diss you and ignore you and reject you. seriously. how can i like myself when others dont??? and i know its not because i dont like myself - this guy has no idea how i feel about myself so its a perfect example. i am a dork and a loser. and i always will be. always was, am, and always will be. i even dont know what the hell my husband sees in me - he must have been desperate for sure! i was his last hope i think.
and my sister-in-law is another example - i was talking to her one time asking about HER and being totally normal and interested not going overboard or anything - totally nice and normal conversation from what i thought. my other sister-in-law interrupts us to ask her if she wants to see pictures (doesnt ask me) and the girl goes "oh yeah anything!" as if she was dying to get away from me - ?? i know i didnt smell. i just dont get it. and there were so many times i went over on my foot and once i fell in this stupid hole at my brother-in-law's house and no one cared or asked if i was ok. they even saw me. they didnt fix it until much later. and barely anyone came to the hospital to visit me when i had my babies - i was alone most of the time. i had to call people with my last one and practically kidnapped a nurse talking to her. everyone else had someone and their husbands in the room but me. i was the only alone most of the time. no one came to see me after the babies either - ther first one they did but the others no one came unless i asked them. no one likes me. and if they do its because of just a few things and they only take me in small doses or they are just as much of a dork as me then. no one really cares though - they dont. just waiting to die......seriously. i wont take my life because i have kids but i cant wait to die!!!!!!
Sweeet Jane, I'm so sorry about all the inconciderate way people can act. I wasn't actually going to come to supportgroups, but somehow just ended up here and saw your post! I know how lonely things can feel at different times for sure. Sometimes it's like we don't fit in anywhere due to a million things but we feel it's because there's something wrong with US! And it usuall isn't.
Maybe this sounds stupid, but have you thought about volunteering somewhere? It's a great way to meet other decent people and you are helping the less fortunate at the same time. I only suggest it because whenever I am doing something like volunteering, I end up with very good friends!!!
I just want you to know that you are loved and I am so so sorry about how you are feeling!!!
Sending hugs, Suzee
i'm lonely most of the time. no one really likes me. it shows. some people may seem to like me well enough but i never really feel wnated and loved. my kids love me but im their mother.
its taking everything in my power not to grab a ****in knife! i dont want to be here!!!! why the **** am i here? why the **** was i born? NO ONE LIKES ME AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST LOST ANOTHER FRIEND NO ONE LIKES ME NO ONE LIKES ME NO ONE LIKES ME NO ONE LIKES ME. IM A LOSER IM A LOSER IM A LOSER IM A LOSER LOSER LOSER LOSER LOSER LOSER LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sweet jane, please just step back and breath. I promise the damage you would do to your children is irreversable. My ex almost convinced me that everyone would be better off without me. Now I see that suicide really, really devastates our children and friends. Sweet jane, I used to believe that I was unlovable, stupid, ugly, and on and on... it's a part of depression and other mental health diagnosis for which I am not qualified to advise about. I just know that our challenges can make us isolate and act in ways that we wouldn't otherwise act.
Are you seeing a councelor/therapist? Mine has done a ton of work with me learning to put the terrible myth's I believed about myself out of my mind or at least cataloged in the Bullshit file!!! :) But it is/was definately work to deal with these things.
Sweet Jane, please count me as a friend, and selfishly I can't take anymore devastation in my life, so you have to stick around!!! Sorry to be bossy!! :)
Just keep posting, as we are all listening!!!
Sending big hugs, Suzee
Hey sweetjane,
Suzee is absolutely right hurting yourself will get you no where. But I do feel an awful lot of hatred and hurt in your message and I think it may be wise to speak with someone who understands.
If those people were so rude as to act cold to you like that, then that is on their shoulders, but I know how it can affect you, it is hurtful. If anyone does that again, imagine that you are taking their hurtful ways and putting it back on them, where it belongs. I have recently started doing this kind of motion I just take my hand and imagine I'm taking a kind of dust off my shoulders and throwing it back on someone. If does help to feel like you're physically removing their bullshit.
Sweetie keep talking, and get that anger out, it doesn't help to keep it in.
Love you
Moongal x
i wish i didnt have to deal with the bitches and assholes i have to deal with but their ****in family so i have to. prima donna ****in bitches!!!!!!!! both side of the familly. MY WHOLE FAMILY EXCEPT FOR MY MOM AND KIDS AND MY BROTHER SUCKS - THEY CAN ALL GO TO FUCKIN HELL!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate them. i do. screw them all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and my so-called ****in friends too - i have very few friends and i cant get too close to them because i am scared they will leave me - and they will - in time they will - i am preparing myself to be completely alone forever. **** it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i will love my kids and my mom and only them - **** the rest of those ****in shits! sorry for my language but guess what? i dont care!
and i dont expect to be friends with anyone new because they will just stop too. i turn people off - you'll see. im doing it now i am sure. whatever.
Hey sweetjane,
I am sorry that you are feeling this way, but sometimes it's good to be angry. Let it go, let that anger and hatred out. Could you speak with any of your real friends and say how vulnerable you feel, cos feeling vulnerable isn't a bad thing, just shows that you're not made of stone.
Keep up the fight and try to realise you are valuable, you are loved.
Moongal x