Feeling good today! I have had a sinking feeling in my gut a

Feeling good today! I have had a sinking feeling in my gut about my husband stayin off the porn sites. Friday I bought software to track computer activity, I tried to install it but screwed up. I emailed the company and they sent me a new download. I had forgotten to turn off the virus software while installing, and other tech. junk. Today I was able to install it in no time. I will get emails of all activity that happens. Certain keywords I was able to enter like "porn" will trigger an instant email sent to me. The best part is I own a business, and live upstairs from my business, so if while I am at work and he is upstairs on the computer surfing porn, it is a short trip home. It is sad that this makes me happy. But that is how it is. I did warn him I was going to put spyware on the computer, he just doesn't know I have done it. I don't always follow thru but this time I needed to.
I am sick of living in fear, wondering if he has secret email accounts, or is still on dating sites. With the history "accidentally" getting erased last week I am back to trust level 0, not that it ever got that high after the infidelity.
Just putting this out there. It is sad that I am feeling this good while feeling this sneaky. Now I have to remember the passwords and hotkeys, not an easy task for me!

You can put all your passwords in a note section of your phone, I wouldn't do it for banks and such, this, yes! Hugs!

@CKarma my phone is prehistoric, no fancy features. I did write them down and hid them away, but if I need them hopefully I can find them!

@darketernal I used to think porn was ok too. Not anymore. His porn usage was extreme. It has cost us more than anyone can understand. Our home was searched by law enforcement, he was charged and did some time in jail for it. He was downloading some very extreme disgusting stuff. He cannot just watch a little, it gets worse and worse if he does. If you want to learn about porn addiction check out yourbrainonporn.com
I need to protect myself, and I have that right.
I cannot stop myself from menstruating every month, so that is a false comparison, it is a physical feature of reproduction in the female body, it is not within my control mentally.
As far as men needing sex, do you think women do not need it as well, or less often? That is just a silly argument, I can tell you honestly in 25 years I can count the number of times I have turned him down on one hand, but I have been turned away many times because of his chronic back pain, or he is to tired.

@darketernal no need to apologize, but I do not think he is alone in it being extreme. Porn causes all kinds of problems physically with men. Seriously, like more young men today like ED, or in my husbands case delayed or no ejaculation or ability to climax. It can be fixed, but it is a hard road for those who travel it.
I love my husband, and am willing to stay with him. But the condition is he cannot use porn ever again. EVER.
Seriously if you want to learn more go to that website, the information there might shock you. It was very eye opening for me.

It really really infuriates me when people come in this "support" group and make comments like "If you just give your husband sex, there wouldn't be a problem." like...why are you in here? That is in no way supportive of anything. Please do some research before coming into a "support" group and providing unhelpful advice to people who are struggling with something like this. Sorry if this comes off rude...but this is not the first time I have seen this happen in here and it gets frustrating after a while.

3 Hearts

@Tiffany81215 AMEN!
It is easy to offer advice on what is ok and what isn’t when you are not neck deep in the $hit, and living with the consequences of your partners bad behavior.

From New Site Discussions to Romantic Relationships

Added porn