For months now I have struggled with what I think is HOCD hoping you could help. I am no 17 and all my life have loved girls fancied alot and have bin in a love with a few however last year I Had a gay experience not because I had an urge but just for the sake of I hadnt had any action in ages and the offer was there. Ever since I have had thoughts however never been emotionally attracted to men I just always ask the question do I fancy them. Is this HOCD? Thanks
Hi there and welcome to the group! It's hard to put a label on these kinds of things, since sexuality is a hard thing to pin down. There is nothing wrong with the gay experience you had and it seems completely natural that you would have thoughts afterward concerning your sexual orientation. HOCD usually implies that you keep worrying about whether or not you are gay to an obsessive point-where it really affects your everyday life. Does this sound familiar? In any case, with any intrusive thought, it can be very helpful that when the thought comes, you try to take a step back, take a deep breath, and tell yourself that the thought is just words- it does not define you and, more importantly, that thought ISN'T you. By detaching from your thoughts that way you can take a step towards realizing that thoughts have no power over you, and then maybe it will make you feel a little easier about figuring out your sexuality. Try to trust your gut in these situations, instead of questioning every thought or feeling you have. And know that you're not alone in this-we're here for you!! Best wishes and I hope this group can be a great resource for you to express your thoughts and feelings, and get feedback from others who understand what you're going through.
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New to this site but just want to thank everyone for the support not something I feel I am able to just tell anyway haha maybe because I desire to join the Army but advised not to use this every day so will try not to but appreciate it haha thanks
And maybe one day the dream I used to have of having a wife kids and to be in the army may actually all come true