Laying down, seldom moving, there is no light, no sound,
just the beating of my heart, thump, thump, thump.
It falters once. A familiar hunger comes from inside.
I give in for a moment. Black viscous ink bursts from my heart,
pulsing through my arteries, spreading more with every beat.
I welcome the amity, remember the memories,
recall the atrocity. I allow it to flow through my veins,
to take over my body, my soul, my mind.
I stand up and stagger. My heart beats clamorously,
Thump, thump….It falters once, twice.
My head is spinning, My body betrays me.
I falter, fall to the ground, I cannot even catch myself.
I lay on the ground, seldom moving.
No light, no sound, only the beating of my failing heart,
with black viscous ink flowing through my veins.
My body abandons me, it can go on no longer.
My heart beats hesitantly, only once until it falters,
one last time. It does not beat again.
Allee!! Hmm....are you OK? This is pretty intense. I hope you are seeing your therapist and talking about your thoughts and feelings.
You are loved and cared about....HUGS..Jan ♥
??????? Allee?????
allee ok--the poem was gorgeous,
but are YOU oK?????
are you speaking metaphorically or ----is your heart having trouble????
love
maureen
I'm fine. Sorry, I didn't think it was that bad. I was just saying ifyou give in it's not a happy ending. I am having trouble still but I guess in a way, this was me saying my ED won't make me happy it never will and it only will give you misery.
I'm okay. I'm a little down. I'm still working on getting a therapist. I'm worried because my boyfriend has been sleeping a lot and is still tired. He is getting blood tests done and I am just really worried...
no no no the poem was wonderful --it really was and i could read into what you were saying----just wanted to check and make sure...
but honeslty the poem was incredible....and yes you are right ----ED only gives you misery...
love
maureen
Love the poem, I'm glad you're okay. I was worried for a second. You're right, no happiness will come from ED.
allee,
that was an awesome poem. i love it. do you have a lot of poems you write? if you do i can show you how i designed my books and you can print a copy of your own poems, even if it is just for your use. i am trying to get mine published one day by a real publishing house. but if you want i can help you get your collection together and make a book. it might not be big and doesn't need to be. but it is a way you can carry your poems with you. and have them close to you. send me a message if you want more info.
scarlette
i love love this poems, allee! really!
love
maureen