Good afternoon. New user here. I use shopping and buying t

Good afternoon. New user here. I use shopping and buying things as a way to get a feeling of self-worth most of the time.

Married with 4 kids. I've gone into 45k of debt just to buy things, to feel like I'm actually alive and not just a work robot supplying money for the family.

Hey. I just happened to stumble across this post. My husband has a terrible spending problem.as if he thinks there is a bottomless pit money. In our marriage there has been a big incident of major financial infidelity. The betrayal was real. He has been like that since I met him almost 20yra ago and we have never had financial stability.always up and down and busy paying back debt. From a wives perspective it is a terrible thing to to live with. That’s if she is aware of all your expenses and the source of it.
It is really difficult to have to share finances with a person that is irresponsible. To me i see the amount of transactions and I don’t spend anything cause I know if I spend, then there is a double spend and with the way he spends we just can not afford it. We are already in great debt because of his issue and it is now coming to a point where this is one of the major contributors to my current turmoil over whether to leave the marriage or not. I just can’t imagine having to live like this forever. Does this sound familiar or am I far off?
Do you shop online, or do you enjoy the outing? Has your spending affected people in your life? Or is it a personal issue? Once you’ve bought the validating goods, How long do you feel validated for before starting to shop around again?

@SisterinChrist

I hear you. You are feeling extremely frustrated over your husband’s spendings.

To answer your question, my shopping addiction started in the pandemic. I am currently addicted with buying bags and shoes. They say that addiction often accompanies a mental illness. In my case, it is anxiety and a bit of depression due to abuse and neglect during childhood.

Have you sat down and talk to your husband? Does he acknwledge he has this issue? Is he willing to consider seeing a therapist?

@Sophiegray
Hi. My addiction started during the pandemic when 4 months into lockdown I discovered online shopping and my weakness are bags and shoes and clothes!