Having such a bad morning!

Hello all my support friends.

Today is starting off rough. I am super, super tired. My daughter and son woke up several times last night because of bad dreams. So, guess who was also up last night several times!!!!;(

I am in much pain this morning too. Because of my car accident, my neck, shoulder, and head are in major pain this morning. I actually thought I was feeling a little bit better the last couple of days and now BAM!!! I am in so much pain again. My chiropractor said that this might happen for a while. It is typical with car accident injuries.

And, I actually went to see the school's health nurse yesterday for help/advice. YES, I did it!!! I should be proud of myself, but for whatever reason am not. I was very nervous and almost chickened out but pushed forward through those 'icky' feelings and did it anyway. I was told I am not eating enough. Then when I said I am running everyday (except for the past couple of weeks because of my accident) she winced a little more. No I am really not eating enough. I thought I was doing "okay". She is going to look into possible groups in the area for me but was not too hopeful. She is also going to put together some information for me on how much I should be eating and what I should be eating if I am going to be running etc...

Honestly, I am FREAKING inside!!!!!! I don't know if I want to eat more. I am already worried that what I do eat will put on weight. Why is it so hard for me to want to change???????? I know I have a problem. I know what my problem could do to me physically yet, the thought of doing the 'right' things to alleviate the problem is sooooo frightening. I still don't get it. Sometimes I take this as a sign that I really don't want to get better????????

Anyway, thanks for being out there to listen to me. It really does make a difference to me.

Love and hugs
Shana

Shana,
Good morning. It is a good morning because behind and along with all the ED crap is our light. We are alive and we are love. This will pass.
I see you taking steps and even with the less than clear outcome, these actions count.
On days such as this when we had less sleep than we need, and perhaps have a food hangover, the sh-- colored glasses hop on our faces. It's hard to see anything other than hopelessness.
Guess what we can change, people "worse" than us have found recovery. We are all rooting for you, and will be honored to witness all the steps that lead you through.
Love,
Patsy

Patsy,

Thank you for your response. I so need some hope and inspiration today!!!

Love and hugs
shana

Aw, I'm so sorry. I get it. And it sucks. But hang in there--it won't be like this forever! Just keep on keeping on, and keep coming on here for support. You can do this. Things will be better before too long.

Vero

Thank you trueimage!

Today is a little better than yesterday. However, the first thing my husband hears as we are waking up is my stomach. He says to me, "someone is in need of food" I asked him if it was him. He goes, that was your stomach - I didn't even notice my stomach was saying or doing anything. ;( The first thing I did do was eat my oatmeal though.

My neck and shoulder are in pain today but not as bad as yesterday. My arm is rather numb today though. I also have to go call my doctor today because the office called my house yesterday needing to speak to me. Hopefully nothing too bad.

Love and hugs
Shana