Head over heels

Although I've lived long enough to know better, I seem to have the same fatal flaw that rears its ugly head in every failed relationship. Simply put, I grow quickly attached to the person that I'm dating. I throw myself into the relationship and expect that the other person should do the same.

Its intense and sometimes overwhelming for the other person as well as myself. I become impatient and I feel let down or unsupported by the other person because they don't seem to be trying. Then the relationship ends and I feel alone and sometimes abandoned. My feelings were so intense that I find it difficult to accept that the other person could "walk away" from such love. I'm left agonizing over what I did wrong, what I could have done better, and how to be less intense. But the end result is that I'm the one that is left hurting after making a huge investment of myself into the relationship. I know that this has got to stop, but how? I hate being alone, but I don't want to sacrifice having a healthy relationship simply for the sake of having one.

Any help that can be given will be greatly appreciated. I also welcome your prayers and positive vibrations.

hi jack welcome to support group.

wow u sound like the charge of calvary coming over the hills to save the natives, have u ever been run over by a huge truck? hmm like a steam roller u want an intense relationship and it runs out of steam.

hon why are u so suprized that people cant maintain an intense relationship? your story makes me think back to my youth when i would b told "SOFTLY softly u catch the monkee"

and in the sense of my own relationship we courted for two years and i do mean court not any hankypanky before we settled into our lives, having survived the last fourty as a couple i think we might b doing ok.

i can understand the need to b a couple but whats the rush?

as always

loving thoughts and positive vibes

Hi Jacki66, Welcome to SupportGroups.com . You seem to know what the problem is. Now what is the solution? Why do you feel you do as you do? Has anything happened in your past, for example, that may be the cause of you doing this?

My husband and I were very good friends for several years before we finally started going together. We went together for several years before we got married.

Slow down, easy does it. Relax. Take time to get to know each other.

Keep sharing with us. We are here for you. ((((hugs))))

I think you should be gentle on your self and not so hard on your self.Try not look into things so much relax and chill out go with the flow. When you are in a relationship that is suited to you it will be easy and not a struggle when you are together, God Bless.

Yes our expectations do get the better of us huh, then we feel like someone crapped on us when really its us that need to slow it down & realize that there is more to being w/someone then all the fuzzy gooy feelings all the time & just be comfortable in knowing we have eachothers back, honor, respect, consideration, safe & secure huh =D

We need to quit over thinking things, women think w/both sides of their brain & men w/one side, I kinda admire that, less stressful.

Take care of you

April