Hello Everyone, I am brand new here. I am at a point where

Hello Everyone,
I am brand new here. I am at a point where most of you have been, I'm sure, where I am feeling absolutely hopeless. I am 43 years old, diabetic with blood sugar now under control, and feel like I have exhausted every viable option for treating my erectile dysfunction. I have a fiancé that I have been seeing for almost 16 months, and we have yet to have sex. We have tried, we want to, we have seen doctors, tried pills, shockwave therapy, platelet injections, and I am only able to get about 75% of an erection, enough to frustrate me and that is it. I feel that, as a man, there is one thing that differentiates us from women, and mine does not work. I have spent exorbitant amounts of money trying to get things in proper working condition with very little results. My fiancé is about 8 years younger than me and has the typical raging sex drive of a woman in her mid 30's. We have talked some about bringing another person into our "sex life" and it gives me great anxiety. I would really like to hear some stories from people who have tried this and what worked and didn't work. I don't want to just send her off somewhere I will worry about her safety, but also I am struggling with being present if a third party is brought in. I want this to be something we both enjoy, as I am really missing the experience of sexual intimacy, as well.

@JN112878 this seems like a very hard place for you to be. What would a third person help with you ED? If it’s not working it’s not working. How can a third person help? Secondly, you seem in love and want her, so how would a third person help with your connection? What are your goals and values in your relationship?


Find a good urologist and try Trimix injections. It takes some schooling to use it properly and get it injected into the cavernosa tubes or it will not work. Implants like Coloplast Titan or AMS 700 may be an option as well? Pump it up and go. HMU if you need help or advice with Trimix.

@Bob1974 Hi Bob! I just wanted to come back here and update you and everyone else. I took your advice and asked my urologist for TriMix. They first prescribed Muse, which just made me sore, no erection. Then prescribed TriMix, but the pharmacy only had the one ingredient (alprostadil) the same ingredient in Muse. This again only made me sore. Finally the other ingredients came in for TriMix. Well, we finally got some time alone Sunday night and BOOM! It worked! I still had the soreness (like a muscle ache) which I am going to bring up at my next appointment, but it WORKED! Listen, for someone who has had a fear of needles my entire life, I have overcome that and am so glad I found this site and some outside advise where it is easy to ask the hard questions.

hello everyone this is my first comment and i want to express my views on your condition (sorry in advance if anything sound bad for you)
As you have metioned your story i don't think so, this problem will solve if the 3rd person will come between you two lovers. You lover her and she loves you that means she understand you then she probably knows it very well that you are giving your 100% to satisfing her.
if you are not capable to erect than nothing bad you can give her pleasure by different methods. There are several sex toys available in market which can help you to get her pleasure.
As you concerened about you ED I have listened there are several branded or generic ed pills available in market such as viagra, cialis, levitra, cenforce, kamagra or more. One of my known tried cialis and it worked for him.
why not consult with your doctor and give these pills a chance to make you rock on bed. If low dosages are not working then try higher one and you know if you feel shy then you even don't need to buy them offline you can order them online.

In last decision is yours sorry if something bother you.....

Contrary to general advice, Each person's sexual needs are different. There are indeed many people who have threesomes. If your belief system allows it and you can enjoy the event and every one behaves safely, there is no harm in trying it. Who knows your psychological needs will kick in and it will work for you. But dont do it if it makes you even more anxious, because that will only cause increased ED.

Hi JN.
Thank you for the confidence! I am going to attempt to talk to my husband about the Trimix... It sounds like you have similar health problems. And you have similar thoughts as I do about bringing in someone else for intimacy... but which to choose.. male or female? I have often wondered which would make my husband hate me less for suggesting it.