Hello
I have a problem that I know plenty have been through and I needed some advice. I was a soldier till not to long ago. I medically retired due to PTSD after 13 yrs of military service. I got married and 2 yrs into my mairage after coming back from deployment my wife cheated on me with who at the time was my best friend. I don't want to get into details about this because just writing about it makes me sick and upset and sad and emotional. its been 5 yrs since it happened. they had sex for about a week every day. we are divorced now and have a 6yr old son. till this day it makes me so upset. It still hurts so much. I have not been able to move on with any woman I have dated. I don't know what to do. im going crazy. I want to move on but the sadness just does not want to go away. I Hate her for what she did but shes the mother of my child and I have to see her regularly because of the the time I spend with my son. I have become a lonely person I don't go out, I don't have friends because my best friend slept with my wife. I have closed myself to everything and I feel the worst is yet to come.
You have been through hell. I am so sorry. I wish I had some magic words to make you feel whole again. I do not. I am glad you came for support. Do you have anyone to talk to? There must be counseling through the VA. It might help you. You have a lot to deal with. Please be okay. You are important. I know this seems impossible but if you can work on forgiving her for your own sake. It will help you a lot. I hope more people chime in here for you. There are many caring people on here. So post often if it helps. Take one day at a time. Maybe join a divorce support group? Just a thought. I thank you for your service to our country to keep us free. I know it sounds hollow . But it is heartfelt. Sending you hope, strength, ((HUGS)). God's healing peace. I hope you don't mind I am praying for you.
Rafil. You have been through so much I am deeply sad for you. I really am a real life human being in fleash and blood also here for you. Oh how lonely I feel too so deeply sad and lonely. I admire your strength. I really hope that you can be the best you can be and continue. You have friends online now to support you and we can be honest and not have the worry or shame of facing the truth of being completely exposed as it is too painful sometimes and raw talking this frankly as we do on here face to face. It is very disappointing reality. I really hope you'll be alright.
@rafil2010 I empathized with you. Nobody deserved that kind of betrayal, from their wife, and best friend. But you've been stuck in a rut for so long....... Why you have kept punishing yourself, you were the one betrayed? Sometimes relationship wasn't meant to be, But I think that spouses/partners should be honest with each other. Cheating is not the answer for solving a bad relationship, it just makes matters worst! It's been 5 years, and you've shut yourself off, from the rest of the world.....You have not been able to moved on with any woman you've dated. You wanted to moved on, but the sadness, just don't wanted to go away. I understand, what you've been going through, for you were so deeply hurt. What about your PTSD? Is it getting better, no more frequent flashbacks? I understand, I suffered from PTSD. I am a survivor of a traumatic brain injury, I spent 4 months in the hospital. Yes, through Hell, and Back and about 5 surgeries...... I am here, ready to fight another day! Yes,, because of First, and Foremost Faith, Family, and Friends, that's why I survived..... And my SG friends also. SG friends Rock! Thank you for your service, which has meant the safety to our country. But now, you have to looked after yourself, as @TeenyBikini posted there has to be counselling with the VA, you needed support with therapy. Yes, in order to get over your wife's infidelity with yiur best friend. It's been too long for you to be so sad. I am here, for you, and so are SG friends to support, and be supported. . Be strong, the best is yet, to followed. Be hopeful.