Hello I hope all is well for everyone. I just want a little

Hello I hope all is well for everyone. I just want a little advice about some thing I always come on here and talk about how my adult daughters don’t wanna have anything to do with me . let me just say they don’t wanna have anything to do with me let’s just say it’s a permanent thing that they really don’t care about me . how do I supposed to move forward I really wanna know “I wanna do it I want to not care about the fact that they do not care a thing about me it’s consuming me and it’s driving me out of my mind and causing me to think that I’m better off not living it’s not healthy and I know a lot of it is my borderline but I need to work on this . My adult children prefer to be with my dysfunctional pm family that has done nothing but abuse me my whole life they rather be with my sister. how can I except this and move forward and love myself because I obviously don’t like myself I’m in so much pain I can’t live like this anymore. I want to move forward so I’ve taken a class online for my job , I’m taking Zumba online what else can I do and I work a full-time job I need to keep my mind off of this and I need to let them go.

I'm so sorry, I can't even imagine your emotional anguish you're going through. Before you totally let go, ask yourself if you tried to mend the relationship. Have you ever tried to learn how you could reach out to them and ask them why they don't want a relationship with you? Have you ever asked them how they feel about things? Would you consider reading up on what you could do when your adult child is rejecting you? Would you consider writing them a heartfelt letter and ask them why they don't want a relationship? Do you want to try to mend the relationship or do you think it would be best to let it go? Maybe just maybe they might be willing to correspond and talk to you about it, either in messaging, a letter or by phone.

I did try to talk to them and I absolutely will try to write the letter again it’s a good idea thank you. I don’t know what the problem is I know that they told me they blame me for things in the past and I’ve apologized and I’ve tried really hard to respect their boundaries I don’t know maybe they’re just going through some thing. but I’m trying to except if they want me out of their life because if I can’t except that I’m just gonna get in a crazy state and I don’t want that neither . I definitely would love to have a book or read about this because I don’t know what else to do. Thank you though for helping me

@Pauline1234 I think you should hang in there don’t throw in the towel yet. You might need to keep distance for awhile and that’s ok but you can still message them and ask how they are doing or just message to say hello and keep it light hearted. If there are things that you do or say that bothers them that’s something you can work on and make adjustments where need be. It’s very possible to rebuild your relationship with them. Even if they aren’t ready to have a relationship right now that doesn’t mean they won’t in the future so keep the door open but hang back. If you feel like it you can send them a card once in a while and on holidays write a little message and leave it at that and of course tell them you love them. I’m sure you are really hurt, I get it but you can still send them your love. They surely can’t pick on you for that right? Go online and do some reading on rebuilding your relationship with your adult children. Don’t let your hurt stop you… keep pushing through ok you got this!