Hi all! I hope everyone is well. Throughout my now year and

Hi all! I hope everyone is well. Throughout my now year and a half of being hsv + you all have helped me find some clarity. I started dating a man who I disclosed my hsv status to and accepted me with love and open arms. After 9 months if this relationship he expressed signs of wanting other people, and that was not at all what i wanted or what was comfortable with. He threw my status in my face and told me I was dirty and risked his health to be with me and frankly now i feel like the biggest scum of the earth. Im heartbroken and disrespected for something that i cant help and disclosed to him before anything.
I know ill get the wonderful and kind, weening out the jerks speech. I just feel so alone. Sad. And heartbroken.
Idk yall but ily you all for being my community to be vulnerable.

welcome back! it's been a while.
i'll spare you the "Weening out speech", but will try to make you see how to be thankful that you found out ***NOW*** that this guy was "Using You"...

there's two sides to every story and i'm not sure what "his side" is, but i know your integrity is high for divulging at the right time. you've taken the high road and THAT shows your merit.

proof of his ignorance of HSV shows by his comment of how he "Risked His Life", and another red flag is how he tried to belittle you buy throwing it in your face and saying you're "Dirty"...

don't be sad from your disappointment. be happy that you have grown wiser from this experience.

your mistake was making him a priority when you were HIS temporary choice.

take all the time you need to digest and heal, pick yourself up, then move ahead. we're here for you...

m_shywalker_ That was his choice. He was ok with it in the beginning. I suspect he wanted out for other reasons and is using this as an excuse. I hate dishonest people.

Late here too!
Sometimes the speech isn’t what will make you feel better but it doesn’t make it any less true!
A- I think you have been able to dodge a bullet here!
B- I think he sounds like the type of guy that would have found ANYTHING in that moment and it really had nothing to do with you having HSV. Crooked teeth, weight, past relationships. He would have grabbed any cheap shot and shot it.

I’ve had both end of the spectrum with men- I’ve had three that I’ve been really interested in who were more than ok with my diagnosis and treated me so kindly, even when things ended. They never told anyone my business or treated me any different.
One boy even continued to send flowers to me for weeeekkkkssss because he loved me. So this barrier we imagine it can create between people falling in love with us is usually more our own feelings about it.
However- more recently I have had the other spectrum and was told that I was ‘just not the girl’ he wanted even though for months he was chasing me. He was image focused and suddenly this ‘perfect girlfriend’ image didn’t meet the universally accept image he wanted so he ended it- so I know how much that can hit you and completely destroy your self-esteem.
But honestly- he was an arrogant nightmare so I’m thankful. But something I did that I’ve never done before is tell a lot of my friend exactly what happened, herpes and all and you know who was seen as the bad guy? Him. For treating as a walking virus and not a human being. The love and support I got was really so special.
Your heart is who you are, and there are a lot of people ready to love your heart so as best as you can try and push this **** aside. So many men will chose to love you regardless of what baggage comes with you so heal from this and when you’re ready, be brave again!
You got this

1 Heart

thx for posting your positive truths!

as moderator, i wonder if what post truly get to the new people here?

some seem to “Post 'n Ghost”. thanks again!