Hi all - new here. I am so incredibly ashamed of the credit

Hi all - new here. I am so incredibly ashamed of the credit card debt I've racked up over the past 4-5 years (about $15,000). It started with my car needing repairs that made me need to put it on my credit card because I didn't have the money to cover it, and started spiraling from there with me just deciding I could buy whatever I wanted (clothes and home decor mostly). It started when I was living in a place where I was feeling bored, lonely, and incredibly isolated in all areas of my life (work, personal, etc.) and it's spiraled and spiraled from there. I was not raised to think about/use money in this way and I know my family, especially my mother, who is an accountant, would be appalled. I'm young, queer, and work for a non-profit and now live in an expensive part of the country. I know I can get a handle on it, and that it's just going to take some time, but I'm sick of feeling so ashamed and angry and anxious all of the time and still spending more.

Hi, I’m in the same boat. I have about $15k of debt as well which mainly came from buying clothes, and I’m a college student unfortunately. Battling shopping addiction is scary, especially that overwhelming fear of what family and friends will think when they hear about the debt and the reason behind it. Money is such a taboo topic, and I wish it wasn’t. What matters is that you’re trying your best to lower the debt and change spending habits though, have you tried budgeting or maybe switching to a debit card/cash to have a spending limit? I believe in you and hope all goes well with battling debt, it’s a tough battle but not impossible. Sending love

1 Heart

@cherryalpaca Thank you so much for your comment and kindness. I really like the debit card idea - I don’t ever use my debit card online because of how easily info can get stolen, and since most of my spending is online shopping, I think that might really help me. I actually had my credit card information stolen online somewhere a few months back (my bank caught it immediately) and my card got canceled, and I had to wait like almost two weeks for my new one to come in the mail - and I spent less in that time! I also downloaded the app Mint and I’m going to play around with its budgeting tools.

I am currently going through car trouble again (it looks like it’s going to end up costing probably almost $700) and that was the catalyst that caused me to reach out today because I’ve been so upset and anxious and angry with myself that it’s such a big deal. I also felt brave enough to share with a friend about my debt, and they responded with a lot of kindness and compassion because they’ve dealt with addiction as well. They texted me this and it made me feel so much better so I’ll share:

“Having money doesn’t make you better than someone who has debt. It’s just a made up number. We just unfortunately need to play this game pretending like the numbers are real.”

Sending you love too - I know we can both do this.