Hi guys.. I uhmm I haven't been on in a while.. Right now I'm alone and I have my knife I used to cut with I lies when I told people I got rid of it I didn't and now I'm feeling very broken and sad and I don't know why I really have it but I do and I don't want to cut I've been 3 years without it.. I just wish I could make the pain the past the rape all of it go away...
I understand why you still keep it. I haven't cut in years but I still keep my scissors that was my "go to" choice. It's understandable that cutting seems like a reasonable decision for what you're going through. I haven't gone through what you have, but I can honestly say that cutting won't change what happened. I'll go through times wondering why I feel so sad and why can't I be happy, but it ends up just being a bad day, or a bad week, because there are so many other things to focus your attention on other than the past. You do not have to limit your happiness because of what HAD happened. It's not happening now. You don't realize how strong you are, a lot of people have that flaw. But you can handle this. It sounds you've already gone through the worst part of it.
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