Hi? I am new at this but I'll start with my story i met my ex 8 months ago i fell in love and i felt so love by him but i noticed back in September how fast he would get mad and dump me at first he wasn't hurtful but over time every time we will fight he would dump me and tell me he doesn't love me how i am nothing to him how he can do better how boring i am it kept getting worse and worse he dump me so many times i lost count . my mind so confused one day he tell me how much he love me and how i am always going to be his baby but when he mad he changes and become hurtful tell me how much happier he would be without me ...well 4 days ago he dump me and kick me out his place all because we couldn't decide where to eat. We both said hurtful things but its been 4 day's and i miss him so much i lost 10 pounds in a month i am so stress i am having surgery soon i just wish he miss me and love me like i do every time he break up with me i always run back he only ran back to me once in December and he would reject me at first and eventually take me back now that its been 4 days i haven't ran back to him and of course he has not contacted me at all . i am so lost i love this guy i am so confused i don't understand how he love me so much and when he mad how quickly he hate me and tell me hurtful things....he treat me like a queen when he happy i am so sad i miss him i don't know what to
This sounds very hard and hurtful. Of course it hurts. I experienced a similar thing in a relationship. I kept going back and going back. And things just kept getting worse and worse. I finally realized that I did not want the rest of my life to be so tortuous, and that I just want a peaceful life, away from such hurtful words and deeds. I closed the door on that person. Things are better now. I am able to live my life in peace. So, I ask you. Is this really how you want to live? To be tortured like this? You are in an abusive relationship. Get out before it becomes a habit.
@Sparky_55 i love him so much my mind so confused i am sitting here thinking maybe he will text me like i always text him but he won’t he doesn’t miss me like i miss him
Oh, yeah. I remember that feeling! You are confusing love with abuse. It is time to take charge of your own life. Don't be a victim of your own emotions, they are betraying you. You are only experiencing withdrawal symptoms. IT goes away. Hang tough. Don't reach out to him.
@Sparky_55 so you don’t think he love me or even misses me your probably right
Is there something you can do to occupy your mind and/or your body so that you can better resist these urges to think about "what might be"? Can you get through the next few minutes ok, do you think? What makes you feel better (besides, of course, giving in to your impulses)?
@Sparky_55 talking about it make me feel better when i am at work i feel the worse i am alone hear thinking about everything when i am home i feel so much happier
I think that he is emotionally abusive. I think that you need to try to get over him and move on with your life. Do you want to live like this? Do you want to go through this torment every day of your life, for ever? What do YOU want? Every time you get back together, you ARE going to break up again, and you will be heartbroken, just like you are right now. It won't change. I have lived this. It doesn't matter whether or not he loves you or misses you. With an abuser, what's important is that you stay away from him.
@Sparky_55 your so right it will never change he broken up with me so many times and never change and i always end up with the same pain… What i want is for someone to love me and treat mr good and never have to question there love for me
And you deserve that. We all do! So, you are the one who is going to have to take charge. It will never change with this man. This man isn't good for you. His "love" isn't love at all, it is emotional abuse. Allow yourself to grieve your loss, because then you can heal, and then you will be ready for real love in your life. If you keep opening the wound, it never heals. Avoid interacting with this person. REalize that texting him, or whatever, leads to pain.
@Sparky_55 i feel depressed right now i have the urge to text him i don’t know what to do i try to go out and i just miss him more
withdrawal symptoms. try to do something else to occupy yourself. Is there a friend you can chat with?
@Sparky_55 i try to go out and eat and i just missed him more to the point that i almost texted him so decided to call it a earky night and go home