Hi, I am new to this site. I guess I'll add a *Trigger Warni

Hi, I am new to this site. I guess I'll add a *Trigger Warning* just cause I don't know if my story would trigger anyone. I hope it wouldn't. I guess I was more looking for suicide survivor support. I lost my partner in 2007 to suicide. It's been a long time but still feels like yesterday. I am now trying to get back into society and into dating again but part of it is hard. I am still broken and I don't want the next person I get with to think that I would compare them to who I lost. I kind of had that with my last relationship and it really bothered me. My boyfriend had asked me if I would ever love him as much as the partner I lost. At the time I played it off but part of me wanted to scream that I didn't think he would ever love me as much as the man I lost did. Part of me resented him for even asking me something like that. I had thought that talking to him about my loss was ok, but after that it felt like he was judging me on it and comparing it or something. I am now trying to start a new relationship and am having flashbacks of that, and don't know if I should just censor that kind of stuff. I have always been very open and honest and I am not sure what is TMI when starting out. There are certain things that still affect me, so I don't know if I should discuss them or not.

I think its important to discuss that and not hide it. Some ppl have self-esteem issues and the idea that someone other then themselves is in your heart hurts them a bit. But it doesn't mean you should hide it.