Hi. I had Bacterial Meningitis in 1995. After having this,

Hi. I had Bacterial Meningitis in 1995. After having this, my mom (and, dad, too) took great care of me. My dad went to work and my mom helped me, so, SO much! Then, in December of 1998, my mom developed a cough, which persisted until March: she was coughing so bad, it caused her to bend-forward. Anyway, mom went to the hospital & was said to have pneumonia. After mom was out of the hospital, her, myself & my family went to see an Oncologist. He said, she had lung cancer & a year to live. So, about 3.5 months passed and mom was gone. I was 19.
Now, I am 37. I've been to bereavement groups. They make me feel better, and then, something just HITS me (ex. I see someone who reminds me of my mom, someone does/says something in a way my mom would, Christmas, the anniversary of her birthday, etc.). I would like to put my crap in a bag and live my life. I know, though, this cannot happen all the time. If someone(s) could please give me some advice, it would be very much appreciated!

1 Heart

I know, I miss my Grandmother all the time, she was my world and it just hits you out of the blue!

1 Heart

I understand. It can be difficult because you don't always know what the triggers are. You're right, we cannot permanently put it in a bag and move on because it's natural to miss someone we love. However, we can learn different techniques to cope with our grief. Several years ago, I lost 9 family members in one year. I read a wonderful brochure called "When Someone You Love Dies". This brochure was excellent in explaining the stages of grief and how everyone goes through the stages differently. It also gives practical information and comforting thoughts to help with living day-to-day despite grief. One of the techniques I use is to remind myself of the time in the near future when my dead loved ones will be with me again right here on earth. When I meditate on that promise (John 5:28, 29; Isaiah 25:8; Mathew 5:5). It reminds me that while my loved ones are gone, it is temporary so I will see them again. When I remember that death is not permanent, it helps me to better cope with those unexpected moments of grief. I don't have to fight it, I just let it happen and then I am able to move on because I know that soon, not only will those feelings be gone but my loved ones will be back with me again. Please take a moment to read the Bible verses for yourself so you can see it's not my opinion but a promise we all can rely on. Also, I included the link to the brochure. It's free to anyone who wants to read it. I downloaded it so I can refer to it whenever I need to.
https://www.jw.org/finder?wtlocale=E&pub=we&srcid=share

1 Heart

I completely understand! How are you doing, now?