Hi, I'm not really new, I just couldn't remember any of my information for my other account since it has been a very long time since I've used it.
Currently struggling with paranoid anxiety, when I'm home alone at night. My dad works nights 5 days a week, so 5 days a week I am struggling.
I can't stop myself from getting up every few moments, walking around the house, checking the windows, doors, locks, opening and looking our the door. I walk around with an umbrella in case I need to hit someone.
I know that I am safe in this neighborhood. We just moved here, but it's a neighborhood watch neighborhood and from what I've seen on the crime rates site, there's been no crimes anywhere near me.
However whenever I hear the smallest noise, I get up and look and breathing heavy and sometimes it gets so bad lock myself in the bathroom.
I sit on my bed all night with umbrella by my side, and phone in hand, usually on the dial screen just in case.
It's really taking a toll on me.
I don't take any meds because the last time it gave me hallucinations that almost caused me to commit suicide.
I was seeing a therapist but my insurance got cut off, so did she. Currently looking for a new one.
For the longest time I've been staying up at night, and sleeping during the day because of intense night anxiety and paranoia.
I'm curious if anyone else deals with this, and what helps?