and need some reassurance. Am I the stupidest woman on the planet? I actually let my a-hole soon to be ex into talking me into using one lawyer for both of us!!! OMG, I look back, and think "What was I thinking?" To be fair to my crying inner child, I am getting a decent settlement from him. But, I took the settlement papers to another lawyer, who looked them over for me. She said I was getting a good deal, but she could have gotten me more. ARRRG! Has this happened to anyone else? Thanks.
Oh, and btw, he's 52, and has a girlfriend who is 34, with a 5 yr old. Can anyone say "Mid-life crisis"
OH goodness Birdy!! YOU are definately NOT the "stupidest" woman on the planet!!!!! Because THAT"S MY title!!! hehehe
I'm not laughing at the reality of what your "has-been" did too you though. I'm really sorry that there are so many A-holes out there. Truly I would like to put them all on an island although I've come to realize we need about 12,000 islands!!! :)
I honestly am so embarr***ed sometimes, about the things my **** has done or is doing!!! I feel like "how in the hell did I not see that"? etc... but hands down, plain and simple facts are that they absolutely choose how things went and what they are doing now is THEIR fault. It might take some time for him to ever realize what a joke he looks like and how absolutely stupid he looks. Remember though, there's about a 99% chance that in 10 years or less she will be telling her own horror stories about being with that "man-boy-loser"!!! Believe me, true ***es don't change anything but the person they are being an *** too. I think if I've gotten the right feeling about you, that you would probably love to try and warn this woman and for sure hope her child doesn't get hurt in the process of his selfishness and dishonorable behavior.
I've used "***" alot today.... must be another in the long line of "phases" of healing!!! LOL
Anyhow, I am willing to share the "stupidest woman on the planet" title.. but I have a feeling we are going to begin to feel smarter every single day we don't have to deal with the "has-been"
YEAH for DIVORCE!!!!
Welcome to support boards!!
Sending hugs to you, Suzee
Thanks, Suzee. I'd love to warn this poor woman what she's getting herself into, but, to her, I'm the ememy. She wouldn't listen if God spoke in her ear!! They deserve each other, anyway. They are both control freaks, and OCD.
Can't wait for this to be done, overwith, and moved on!!!! Glad I found this forum.
Hi birdy,
How are you feeling today? I hope you are doing ok. Please let me know how things are going!
Hugs, Suzee
Hi Suzee
I'm doing good this weekend. Am spending it with my cousins, who take me in for weekends with no questions asked. Will have a nice holiday tomorrow, as I will be spending it with my loved ones. Hope your Easter is great!
Hugs back,
Birdy
OHHH Birdy that is wonderful!! I'm so glad you will be spending your holiday with loved ones!! I LOVE that you have such wonderful cousins!! YEAH!
You sound happy tonight! I'm really glad! I am glad I met you and that you are here!
Sweet dreams, Suzee
Birdy, I agree with Suzee, I take the cake too for being the most stupid woman walking the face of the earth! My now ex wanted to use the same attorney to start out with, but what he didn't know is I had the disc of what he did to the ex-wife prior to me (he's had SO many, I'm not sure if I was number five or even six!) and believe me, I was jumping up and down happy when I found that! I decided hell no, the big A-HOLE was going to use his own attorney because I was not going to walk screwed over as bad as the one before me had.
What your ex is going to learn is only 50% of first marriages survive (shocking!), and now the statistic is only 25% of the second marriages survive, so he'll end up going through this again, and probably again, and again like my ex. I also wished I could warn my ex's most recent woman (well, that's being nice, she's a slut LOL!) who is now living in what use to be my house so she wouldn't end up screwed over too, but you're right, it would go in one ear and right back out the other because what I have decided to call "serial grooms" have learned to show a new-be their best qualities to snag them, and then after marriage, out comes the real person and then the woman is shocked just like you were and I was.
I'm glad you have a really fun and Happy Easter planned with family! Enjoy it and don't even let him enter your thoughts for the entire day!
I'm glad you found this site, there are so many people who have so much compassion and understanding for what others are going through AND a whole lot of information that really does help you understand you're not alone at all. We're here for you, okay? Sunshine!
Sunshine,
5 or 6 ex's??? OMG, I can't imagine ever getting married again for the 2nd time, let alone 5 or 6 times! See, that's the difference between men and women. Women don't need a man to be happy. In fact, we are happy without one! I know sooooo many women who are married, miserable and lonely. I was one of them.
So, what did you get from having the disc of your ex? I wish I had a tape of my ex yelling and cursing at me, so I could of played it for HIS lawyer. I wonder what I would have gotten out of that. Oh well, water under the bridge now. All I can do is take what I can get from him, and move on.
Have a great holiday, and thanks for the supprt. This group is great!!!!
I'm single and travelling Australia with my youngest daughter having a ball, while my ex-hubby has remarried to a girl 15yrs younger than him, and they have had two little kids together, the youngest one has only just turned 1yr.
What a ****. lol.
We're in our early 50's, and he's just starting a brand new family.
Look who's laughing now. hahaha Not him that's for sure. We actually had a civil talk the other night and he wishes he'd just stayed with me. Haaaa - too late mate.
It actually took me a few years getting over our breakup and how I got replaced by a younger model, but hey - now - I'm the one who won out of all of this.
It's turned out to be the best thing he ever did for me.
Men are so co-dependent it's a joke.
I plan on having a bloke in every port lol, but at the moment I'm having to much fun to even think about blokes. They really are more trouble than they're worth.
You're better off without a full timer if you can manage it. Go out have fun, and enjoy single life for awhile. Get to know yourself again.
Cheers, and all the best
gottasmile
Hi Birdy...well, on the disc was every single document tied to his divorce from the ex before me, He had the records "sealed" by the courts so nothing was public, which meant by me getting hold of that disc it showed where he stood financially when that wife was divorcing him. He was trying to get by with saying none of the money he made and had in any of the accounts was made during the years with me, but saying he had it BEFORE he was ever with me....which was nothing but one big lie. I knew he had to have that info documented somewhere, so I waited for him to be out of town and went through box after box after box until I found it so my attorney had the proof. He had already emptied his desk at the house of ALL paperwork and hidden it, so I had nothing to use as proof until I finally found that disc. Talk about looking for a needle in a haystack!
Yep, his MO is to not spend one second alone if he doesn't have to. He'll marry again and again I'm sure. I don't get it at all. He isn't marriage material, obviously, so why keep marrying over and over again?! Duhhhh!!!!!