Hi y'all. I was here before with a different username (could

Hi y'all. I was here before with a different username (couldn't figure out what it was or my password so I made a new acct)
I was the cheater in the relationship, it went on for some time. I feel horrible from what I've done. He made the choice for us to stay living together and try and work it out.. All while he gets to look around in tinder and other dating sites.
Well now I'm 15 weeks pregnant (just over a year after coming clean to my bf) he of course doesn't think its his, he chooses not to tell anyone, gets upset when I ask if he ever will... He's just ashamed of the pregnancy. Well yesterday I met with my counselor and told her what's going on and she thought for us to work on us and being a family I should ask for him to stop talking and trying to meet randoms. So I did that last night cause I felt like it was the right time..*he's out of town for a business trip* we were already in a conversation about how hes so unhappy and I dont do anything to make him happy. So I told him how I feel.
Anyone have any advice? I would really like him to stop with the dating sites, now is a time we should be focused on our family not what else is out there.

1 Heart

Sorry to hear what you're going through, but why did he get on those sites if you guys were suppose to work on the relationship? It's a bit confusing. And you knew about them but said nothing?

1 Heart

@090915DDay I’ve asked him many times and he said “you have seen what else is out there I should be able to do the same” when we were like together before my infidelity he was talking to chicks off the classified ads on Craigslist. I have said stuff about them constantly. I have now told him that he needs to make a choice. Its either baby and I or the randoms if he chooses us he will delete the accounts the chicks off his fb and sc and focus on us. If its them than I’ll move out and just talk to.him about the baby… He said its not fair.

First off, he's a real **** for saying that it might not be his. If he thinks that way why is he even choosing to "work" on things with you. It's not a relationship if he's meeting with other women just because you cheated. Two wrongs do not make a right. If that's the case then he doesn't really forgive you and it's been a year. That means things are not going to get better. Dating other women but living in the same house as you and playing"house" is not working on your relationship. If he really wants to work on things with you then he will respect you when you ask him to delete the dating websites and take your family seriously. Once a baby is in the picture then he should be supportive and helping you get through this otherwise, he is bringing negativity to yours and your babys' life which is not fair.

2 Hearts

It is a horrible thing to have to go through. My whole pregnancy (only lasted 7 months due to stress causing her preterm labor) her daddy told me how much he hated me and her and wanted to kill me and get rid of the problem so I know how bad it sucks to be alone and unwanted during a pregnancy. Congrats to you by the way. But I also know as a person who was cheated on by him with someone who was basically my sister when our daughter turned three months old, I also know how much cheating breaks someone. Its been three months since I found out and I can't picture even being over it a year from now. By the way he is acting now it seems as though maybe a small separation would be best. He clearly hasn't moved on. If yall try yo stay together he will just build up more resentment causing arguments in front of your little one that he/she shouldn't be around or see. It could also cause you preterm labor having all of that stress going on while pregnant. And trust me that's scary as hell. But if yall take a break you could either end up realizing how much you two miss each other and remember everything you two loved about each other to begin with. Of not you may end up finding someone else who makes you happy and loves kids

From Romantic Relationships to Cheating & Infidelity