How did it get so bad

I was doing SO good. Sticking to my healthy organic diet. Then, I started back on the sugar... days after I was binging and throwing it up because I felt SO mad at myself. Now it has gotten seriously out of control. To the point that I feel I have to throw up even the good stuff if I eat too much. No one knows and I am determined to stop on my own. I want to stop but it seems food is in control this time.

Hello!

Well I think reaching out to this site is a great step for you. I can relate to your situation in that no one that I still talk to knows about my current problem. The thought of telling someone all of it, is scary, and almost embarrassing.

However! I think that you can do this! It is really scary to think of giving up this addiction that has provided a type of comfort for some time. Food is always there whereas sometimes people aren't. My best advice to you would be to keep staying strong and know you are not alone! :)