How did you know you were ready to quit bp for good??

Hi support group,

I wonder if I'll ever get over this b/p thing. I still continue to b/p virtually every day (sometimes several times)... yet I will complain that I want to get "over it."

Some part of me still wants to have her cake and eat it too. I don't know WHAT it will take for me to FINALLy rid myself of this evil habit. I thought that reading certain books, etc. would "scare me into stopping" but somehow I keep managing to slowly poison myself.

Please... if you've had some revelation in how you knew you were ready to make the serious commitment to stop and stop for good - can you please share it? I started seeing a therapist (again) last week.

I appreciate your help in advance.

Desperate,
Caroline

Caroline...I sense your desperation. Being ready to stop is the first step, but it often requires another step to make yourself accountable in some way to changing the behaviors. A meal plan is a good tool for this, when someone can closely monitor it. It's great to want to do it on your own, but the reality is, it's not often possible without some very rigid structure and support. Can you talk to your therapist about a plan to help you implement new behaviors? Please take care, and keep sharing..Jan ♥

it takes the guilt--the sheer guilt of destroying your health, your mind, body , spirit, ---ED is like---taking your body and using it as a mop....

it took the extreme GUILT of hurting my body to the extreme... it wasnt until i felt guilt for that ---that i became better.... it can kill your health and cause you do pass away---harsh but true and it is that reality that got me better. plus, my fiancee said he would not propose marraige and that we were over unless i got help. so i did , but i did it for me. i guess it takes the beginnings of self love ....i know ED pateints have a ton of self hate so self love has to step in to stop the destructive behavior... i still now dont love myself but am starting to ...

also the fact that it was destroying my life, dreams, mental health, anxeity, hatred for life, isolation, the fact that it is a disease that causes the most misery out of anything i have ever seen in my life.... and i dont want that misery anymore. im tired of it. even know a year in recovery i still battle the ED thoughts everyday and i cant stand it! ughhh... i want a life of peace excitement and joy rather than self hatred, fear and death...

i wanted to be a better me.... i wanted to do things in life. i didnt want to pass away frommy ED as i almost had in the past. i didnt wnt to do anymore damamge to my body that i already did--i have arthritis and IBS from my ED...

i wanted --something more than sheer misery out of my life. and thats how i did it...

love
maureen