HOW TO GET OVER YOUR SHYNESS.
1. Accept yourself for who you are
The first step in getting over shyness is to accept yourself for who you are. We all have role models and idles but you should never try to be anyone but yourself. Perhaps you’re a quiet person and slightly withdrawn by nature, if that’s the case then so be it. Being quiet isn’t a bad trait, there’s much beauty in the personality of a quiet person.
•Recognize your personality attributes, being quiet doesn’t mean your less significant to outgoing people.
2. Practice calming the mind
Shyness is very much a mental conditioning, when you experience a bout of extreme shyness your mind starts to race with fearful thoughts. You find yourself panicking about what might go wrong and struggle to relax. Take each moment as it comes and try not to think about what might happen, focus instead on what’s actually happening.
•Learn to identify fearful thoughts early on and calm your mind with relaxation and breathing techniques.
3. Make an effort to put yourself out there
Being shy can cause you to develop habits whereby you try and avoid engaging with others and social situations. However this will only worsen the problem! Make an effort to step outside your comfort zone and interact with others, ask yourself “what’s the worst that can happen?” Is it really that bad and how likely is it to happen anyway.
•The more you engage with others the more confident you’ll become in social situations.
•Take small, consistent steps, build up your confidence gradually by stepping outside your comfort zone.
4. Work on your social skills
Practice your social skills around people and in social environments your comfortable with. Focus on improving in areas such as asking questions, speaking with confidence and adding humor and jokes into the equation. Try also other workable techniques such as maintaining eye contact when engaged in conversation.
•Concentrate on allowing the conversation to flow naturally without the fear and anxiety.
•Be yourself, if you can do it around friends and family you can do it around others as well.
5. Avoid making excuses to remove yourself from social engagements
Whenever you’re in a social environment and feeling particularly distressed and anxious don’t allow yourself to make excuses to remove yourself from the situation. Even if you’re quiet and withdrawn, cope with the situation as best you can.
•Assess your feelings and thoughts afterwards, learn from them so that you’re better prepared in future.
6. Practice visualization techniques
Using visualization is a powerful tool for reprogramming your mind on a subconscious level. If practiced regularly it can have a profound impact on helping you get over your shyness and related anxieties.
•Visualize yourself in a social environment as the confident, outgoing person you’d like to be.
•Practice your visualization techniques daily for at least 10 minutes.
7. Focus your attention on others
Whenever your engaged in one-to-one conversation focus your energy and thoughts to the person you’re sharing the conversation with. Take each word as it comes and really absorb what they are saying. Channeling your thoughts will help prevent any thoughts and feelings of shyness and prevent you from becoming panicky.
•If you don’t feel comfortable fully conversing with the other person then ask open ended questions.
•Remain attentive and focused during conversation, try also to maintain eye contact with the other person.
