I am feeling lonely and sad, because I learned about a year

I am feeling lonely and sad, because I learned about a year ago that my husband of 42 years never loved me. And that might be the reason I strayed from our marriage. I had multiple sexual affairs, but now I have been sober from acting out sexually for 19 years. Although now I find myself being obsessed with a man I can't have. I don't know what to do. All I do is think of being with this person.

2 Hearts

Does your husbands have a girlfriend? Can you stay married on paper and have other relationships? ?
I am not saying that’s a good idea or not. Some people do it.
Best of luck.

@105 As far as I know he doesn’t have any girlfriends, but decades ago, he did have one long term affair.

Is divorce an option?

@Fohb460 No divorce is not an option for me. I have already tried asking my husband for a divorce and he won’t give me one.

Sara. I an sorry you are in this position. Being "obsessed" with this one person must be very difficult. How do you know him? Is there a way to make connections with other people who can fill your time and hopefully meet some of your emotional needs? Are you going to any meetings re:sobriety? They can be good places to vent your difficulties. I have been abstinent for 6 years plus. Sober for almost 2 yrs

@Richard68, did you not notice that Sara is “married” to this person.