I can't deal with my 16 year old son. He is mentally I'll with high anxiety and anger issues. At this point I would trade problems with anyone. Many I'm doing something wrong in my mind, but I've run out of patience.
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Look at him. He is your son. Try to remember the baby you birthed. It is hard for you, but he is all you have and you are all he has. If you look past the issues and focus on the love you clearly have for him. Please breath through it all and hopefully it will improve.
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@SpoonfulOfHanii Hi! I have taken time to reflect on your comment as it has really struck a chord with me. I do love my son very much, but honestly, when I look at him I just feel so much pain. There have been so many bad experiences over the years, even as a baby. And a handful of good ones. I think I need more people helping me a certain amount of distance from him to keep my sanity. I am working on both of those. If I can pull that off, the rest of my life will be cake! This is by far, my biggest struggle.
I can't imagine how hard this must be for you. People who have anger need love but it's also extremely difficult to love someone with anger problems. Is it possible for you to set aside quiet time for yourself in the day?
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@MsDisappointed Thank you for listening. I did just take some time away with my daughter and it was great! I don’t get to do that much so it was a treat. When I get a break everything feels so normal again and I can think clearly. So far, things seem to cycle back and for between a normal busy life and utter chaos at home. It does get very bad. Things crashing and breaking if I try to enforce even mild discipline. Sometimes I go into work with hands shaking and can barely hold it together. I’m not sure how to protect the other children in the home. I have tried everything I can think of. The list is long.
I understand. Motherhood doesn't always change you from being an independent individual. You were assigned a difficult task to care for a life. However, that particular life is not always the easiest to care for. You have done a good job. I believe that. Do what you need to for you and hopefully it would help you two as well.
@SpoonfulOfHanii OK thanks! I have 13 months until he is 18. I need to get him signed up for every single resource I can. Time is moving slowly so I hope I make it in one piece. You are really so sweet, thank you for listening. That’s a great start!
When u try the gentle approach what happens? When u say.. Son, I KNOW you are better than this! Be that person I know you are!!! I live every part of you!!! Does he resist that too? I have a a very defiant 6 year old.. Not comparing but I KNOW the frustration and helplessness you feel. I am so sorry