I didn't know why I do this? I try to understand but I can't

I didn't know why I do this? I try to understand but I can't. Do any of you understand why you do it maybe it cause help me to understand why I do it.

The way it was explained to me is we use food as a "substitute" for something we are lacking. In my case it was caused by my husband's affairs.

@howdidigethere2 Have you been able to find healthier alternatives in dealing with those affairs? Disordered eating is of course, self destructive and doesn’t really address the real issues.

You do it for the same reason a smoker smokes or an alcoholic drinks. You act on the signals sent by the most primitive part your brain. But this doesn't mean you are weak - these impulses are extremely strong, and, trust me I know, it's very hard to fight them. But you can do this! Just wait till they appear again, and kick their ***! :)