My son just sent me a text and said he was not coming home for xmas now. He said I was not stable. :( I can't believe that my own son said this to me. He is 16 years old. I have been looking forward to seeing him all week. He was going to come over for dinner. So I planned it all week.:(It was the only thing I had to look forward to all week. And now this:( I guess I shouldn't have gotten upset because he decided to go out with friends tonite instead of coming to see me. I have been alone all week, I have not seen anyone really all week. So I guess I got bent out of shape because he changed the plan. So..he says I am unstable and we can't get along. I have nothing to live for anymore. Not one thing:(
If it were me I would recall him and gentely explain what you said...tell him you understand he wants to see his friends and should that's ok it your life too. Tell him your my son that I love deeply and look forward of seeing even if it the 5 precious minuntes, stop in when you can...but please don't stay away! This might make a difference if you try again. Be cautious that you don't pressure him or he will stay away.
Best Wishes!!!
I screwed up and I probably did scare him away. I have sent him a few text messages and he will not answer me..nothing. He won't reply back. I told him how worried I was and still nothing. I don't see that there is anything left for me to do. I think I have to just somehow face the fact that my son does not want me in his life. Or he does but only on his terms. He only stays here when he feels like staying here, he doesn't go by rules..he never has. And he tells everyone that I am unstable, so people will feel sorry for him and give him a place to stay. He tries to make me feel guilty over everything. He doesn't own up to anything. I feel like I have created a monster.:( I don't know how he ended up this way, but I am sure it is my fault. It always is.
great advice woodchuck!
wwte, does your son not live eith you? what do you think why he said you were unstable? did anything happen recently to make him feel that way? what is your relationship like generally? do you think you could explain to him how you feel about him pushing you aside like that?
sorry for all the questions but it might make it easier to find a solution for both of you.
hugs
maedi
He generally lives with me, he always has. But we have been going through alot lately, the last few months especially. He is doing drugs, and that is killing me. I can't seem to do anything to help him. He will admit one day he needs help, the next day he says he's fine. And I am just supposed to go with whatever he thinks that day. He is on two kinds of medications for bipolar. And he gets so depressed. So I talk and talk and try to help him, but I feel like I make him worse. I have depression myself so my moods are all over the place. I have been alone all week because we got into an arguement last weekend and he left. Things were going pretty good this week. He was keeping in touch with me at least through texting. Then today he said he could not come by for dinner because he had to work tomorrow(he quit school). So I asked him if he could come today instead, because I was looking forward to seeing him. He said he had plans. So I got upset. Then he said..see, you are unstable..we can't get along,bye mom. And that was it. The last thing he said.