I feel so emotionally distant from the whole entire world. Wishing I could find one soul on this earth that understands me. I made the decision to leave my 21 month old daughters father back in September when I met someone I found to be better. I think I was just exhausted and lonely and thought that getting into a relationship with someone new would make me happier. It has in some ways but in some ways it has not. Now im 9 weeks pregnant, and have no support emotionally or financially from my current boyfriend who seems to care more about himself than me. I am worried because now i will have two babies to take care of and no promises that anyone is going to help me or be my shoulder to lean on. I work full time yet hardly manage to pay the bills because I do not get child support since we do shared parenting. I don't think my boyfriend will step up to the plate and help me out. He has no motivation to grow up, get a good paying job, or move out of his parents house. He cares more about the well being of his dog than he does me. He refuses to make sacrifices to help me out. I used to be a dog lover until I realized he would do anything for his dog and not for me. I have such hatred for that dog because it literally ruins our relationship. He can't ever sleep over because his dog will "freak out" and he can't move in with me because I'm not allowed to have dogs in my apartment. Part of me just wants to move on with my life and either raise the baby on my own, or give it up for adoption once it is born and forget about him because he disappoints me too much. I can't take my depression/bipolar/anxiety meds because I am pregnant and my moods have been so up and down. Sometimes I feel borderline suicidal because I feel so worthless. I just wish something good would come my way so my life can move forward.
1 Heart
You can still earn child support with joint custody. It would help you out a lot. Consider it. && Please for your child's sake stay strong. You can do it on your own. With child support and your job you should be able to make it work .Try looking into governmental programs to assists with food, rent, healthcare, etc. & something good has happened to you...you are carrying hope inside you. That child you are contemplating giving up is a second chance for you. You can give them a better life which helps you have a better life
Something good will happen. You have to make some choices in your life. U r worth more then what you are getting