I'm not sure I want to live anymore. I feel horrible.
The past 30 hours of my life have made me feel so confused and I feel like I should just end everything.
I'm scared of death though. I don't like not knowing what may happen to me. I feel scared. I don't really want to die, but I do. Obviously my not wanting to die is over-powering my want to so I am reaching out for help...
Hi Rain_Spitze, Welcome to SupportGroups.com . You should contact a doctor immediately for help. Also let someone who knows you face to face what is going on and how you are feeling. This is the link http://suicidehotlines.com/ for Suicide Hotline. Call them. Please tell someone who lives near you - pick up the phone now. Feel free to continue to sare with us. We are here for you. I am going to pray for you. ((((hugs))))
Dear Rain,
I have been there before and I still struggle today with the contemplation of suicide. A few months ago I attempted suicide by overdosing on prescription pills. Even though I had been so scared of death and deep down knew I didn't want to die, I somehow found myself swallowing over 100 pills. After the trip to the ER and spending several days in the ICU I found myself alive surrounded by the many people who love me.
I know that things can get beyond difficult in life and it seems like the walls of your strength and positivity are crumbling down, but know that your life can never be too messed up to fix. At the time of your negative thoughts and pessimistic outlook for your life, don't lose sight of the big picture. I strongly believe that whatever is going on in your life will mend itself overtime. You are not alone. Many people have felt similar to you, but your own circumstance/issues are unique to you. Sometimes it doesn't feel better when someone says, "I know how you feel" because you think to yourself... "No you don't... You have no idea how I feel!" The important thing is to remember that although someone may not know how you feel or why you feel that way is that they are there to support you and they care about you. I care about you and I hope you learn the easy way not to attempt suicide. I learned the hard way and some people are unfortunately not as lucky as me to survive. Best of luck to you and welcome to the support group.
Your healing starts here. Keep me updated on your triumphs and struggles.
Butterfly