I felt like i had control of my binges for a short while...TI felt like i had control of my binges for a short

I felt like i had control of my binges for a short while...Then my grandma got hospitilized and died..Now i feel like im almost gaining control again, but it slips out of my hands when a day or two has passed, as i binge hard again and again...20 pounds added since then, and I really just wanna have control again.

You're going through an extremely difficult and hard situation right now. It's okay to not be perfect and to grieve, allow yourself to time to heal and don't be too hard on yourself!

Throughout my own struggles with BE I probably gained about 40 pounds in the last year alone. That is just a number though! Right now I'm focusing on getting healthier and gaining my confidence and control back. That is so much more important than a number. You will have control again. It will take time and hard work, but you're already off to a great start by reaching out to this group.

What has helped you thus far?

Mostly just having small bursts of "having it together" they come in random, and then I feel healthy and good for 2-3 days, and then the boredom and numb feeling in me comes again, waiting to be filled out with huge amounts of foods..Right now I'm yo-yoing back and forth on the scale, but staying steadily on the same unhealthy weight of about 20 pounds too much...I feel like that my view on myself is a cause, which is a bad circle as I dont like what i see in the mirror...Thanks though, I will try to keep a positive outlook on the whole situation, and maybe not be so hard on myself..

Trust me I've been there too! Where I'm good for a few days and a few weeks and then I let it all go. So far what has helped me is eating about 5 times a day, so 3 healthy meals with two snacks in between. This keeps me full and I allow myself treats or sweet in small amounts every other day. Of course I would love to not eat sweets or chocolate at all, but allowing myself a little has given me that satisfaction I need to, to curb the cravings. I make sure to eat lots of fruits and vegetables, but I include carbs and extras in there too. Right now I am focusing more on fueling my body as well as moderately indulging and trying to ditch the "all or nothing" mindset. The "all or nothing mindset" is what has gotten me into the problem of eating so well for "X" number of days and then binging. No one's perfect, I still have my days, but my binging episodes are less in number these days. You might find some of this helpful or at least something to think about.