I have a question: Many of you know that I've decided to file for divorce after discovering my husband's infidelity nearly 9 months ago. I've been praying and asking for a sign. I also wanted to make sure that I wasn't only filing for divorce because of my husband's infidelity. There are many reasons why I think divorce is the option for me perhaps for us--my husband and I. Besides
My husband's verbal, emotional, mental abuse I've endured since discovery...my husband has said he doesn't want any more children. I have a strong desire for more children. When we dated and when we were first married we talked about having 3-4children. Since discovery he has told me he never said or agreed to that. And that he only wanted one or none. I know in my heart I wouldn't have married him if he didn't have the desire that I do. Here's where I am getting at. This past week I spoke to a stranger about my situation. I didn't share with this stranger anything about infidelity only that my husband doesn't want more children (we have a toddler) and that i was thinking I should divorce because I will resent him for us not having more children and he would resent me if he gave me more children. I asked her for her prayers. This evening I picked up an old book in a book store about fortunes and what your name means type of book (I know not reliable) but I looked up my name and read that I would be blessed with the laughter of many children. Thoughts?
It could also be grandchildren unless you're a teacher.
@Bee4bdn that is possible. I’m not a teacher. I know it not reliable. I just couldn’t pass up the timing of the discovery.
Met the stranger, shared my story, and then less than 30minutes I read that in a book in the bookstore. Normally I wouldn’t read such nonsense but I was drawn to the cover and opened it. I didn’t seek out the book. It was on a clearance table.
You don't deserve any verbal, mental or emotional abuse from your h. These kinds of abuse are just as bad as physical abuse. Your husband doesn't sound sorry for what he did to you. He doesn't deserve you. My opinion I think you definitely needed to go through with the divorce. You deserve someone who respect you and wants to have a family with you. Believe me if my husband wasn't remorseful, sorry or regretful for what he did. I would have filed for a divorce no questions asked. But since my husband proven to me physically, mentally emotionally, spiritually and socially he was truly sorry. I decided to give him that 2nd chance and that all he gets. He knows if he cheats again he will lose his family. He swears and promises he will never do it again that his family means to much to him to ever risk that again.
@magicstick22 My advice would be to not rely on chance coincidences and instead, rely on sound judgment. No one deserves to be abused. Get out, if not for your sake, then for your child's sake.
I'm sorry you are experiencing this...but before you have another child, both of you need to be emotionally strong. Have you gone to a counselor...one or both of you? Talked to a trusted source? Though i understand your pain...i too was once married to a guy like that. I tried counseling, which helped me but not our marriage...anyway, make sure you document stuff, etc. in case, if you do divorce, he holds stuff against you and gets sole custody of your child...anyway, praying for you.
I believe in signs. I believe if you pray hard enough God shows you the way even if the sign is difficult to understand.
That being said, I don't think you need a sign for what you should do. Your husband has provided all the signs you need. Move on and don't take his abuse and hopefully you will meet the man of your dreams that loves you and you can have a family with.
It sounds like you have already made your decision. Tough as it is, I think you should stay your course and be true to yourself or you may have regrets down the road. You should not have to put up with any abuse...especially from the person who is supposed to love you most. All the best.