I have secrets. Many of them. All will be revealed soon to t

I have secrets. Many of them. All will be revealed soon to the one I have so desperatly tried to hide from. My heart is heavy. I can't stop crying. He will hate me. I will lose everything. Every breath I take hurts. I will do as I've been advised. I will wait to do this with counsel avaliable. But, Can I do this. Can i inflict hurt?
The lies and voices are working double time. Your worthless. You're disgusting and broken . Tormented by all the thoughts racing through my head. A lifetime of brokenness. Compassionate people offering help but inside.... The inside lonely places can never be helped from the outside and I don't know if I'm strong enough to do this. So tired

Those voices. They whisper in your mind but they hurt like they are screaming. They never seem to end. I know how you're feeling. You just have to be brave. You've already inflicted the hurt. Now you just have to be brave enough to fill those empty places on your own. My wife has chosen to stay. But I know both from her words and from her eyes, we aren't married anymore. No one outside can give that back to us. The only people who can are us. It is such a heavy burden that we put on others. If only somehow we knew before, right? You just need to decide if its worth fighting for or not regardless of how tired you are. I believe in my wife and I. I can believe in you too. Be strong.

1 Heart

Thank you.