I isolate myself so much it's justvnatural to me to sit in t

Mental Health Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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I isolate myself so much it's justvnatural to me to sit in the corner and hide. I wish I could go back to how I was before I got raped.. I'm so outgoing but spend most of my time alone because it's easier & I don't have any friends

3 Hearts
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I'm here for You

1 Heart
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I know I haven't been through what you have but you are always able to talk to me if you need it.

1 Heart
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@AllisonH0099 Hi tryingtorecover889, I am very much ‘isolated’ in every way. I don’t have friends, I only speak to one family member (my mum) and, I just want to be alone all of the time… I ‘understand’ why I am like this and, can totally ‘identify’ with your posting…, I just wish, I wasn’t like this. I wish I could be like the child I was before, my nightmare began. ‘Happy-Go-lucky’ and, not a ‘Care-In-The-World’… Then perhaps, I wouldn’t be afraid of ‘even’ my own ‘shadow’ at times and, I wouldn’t have the ‘Re-enforced Cocrete Barriers Up’ constantly when around people… Somedays, I just want to die and, I think about suicide every day. I have tried over the years to ‘Trust’, to ‘Open-Up’ but, it’s always ended badly. There has only been two people who in my past, have helped. my ‘Doctor’ who, I saw for well over 25 yrs plus and, she knew ‘everything’ about me and, was an amazing ‘help’ along the way (she has just recently retired so, I don’t even have her anymore) and one ‘Therapist’ who, once I actually got to the point of ‘Opening-Up’, help me enormously and, we even eventually became friends (although, I know this is ‘frowned’ upon but…) then, she moved away so, I no longer have either of the two people I’d ‘Trust’ my ‘Life With’ around anymore… I feel even more (If that were possible) isolated and, I know, I have gone on a ‘Deep Downward Sspiral’, since they haven’t been around… I appreciate, you can’t ‘Live-Your-Life’ through other people but, it freakin helped so much, just to have, ‘Someone-In-My-corner’ who knew, where and what I’d been/am going through and, more importantly, ‘Didn’t Judge or Re-Coil’ from me… So, I do ‘Get’ what you are saying as, I’m living the same ‘Hell’… I’m here if you want to talk or PM me anytime… I won’t ‘Abandon You’ and you can ‘Trust’ me explicitly… Sent with love, Trish x