I lost my wife 45 days ago and i have to wait to find out th

i lost my wife 45 days ago and i have to wait to find out the cause as it is being investigated by the coroner which can take 6 months as my wife was discharged from hospital just 2 days before she died just 5 weeks short of her 37th birthday yes she has a few medical conditions like epilepsy angina asthma depression and a few others and other than her epilepsy being uncontrolled she as sort of OK until 3 months before she died suddenly at home in my arms and i just cant get the memory of the day she died out of my head, i have been getting about 2/3 hrs sleep a day if i'm lucky if it wasn't for our 2 teenage children i dread to think where i would be right now. i know its going to be very difficult for a while but our lives have forever been changed and they are about to change again because i now have to go into work and as ive been a carer for soo long i have always been around and now i wont be as the only job i can get is shift work so ever other week i will bearly see my kids at all and thats just scaring me even more

1 Heart

I am so very sorry for your loss. It is going to take you so much time to grieve through all of this and there really is no time limit since it is all different for each person. Yes your life has changed and that will take time to get used to it. Don't be so hard on yourself right now. You are doing everything you need to do and let your emotions do what they need to do right now to heal. Sending healing prayers and hugs to you and your family. xoxo

@brokenman831 i know how you feel right, i had quite similar situation with you, my husband had pulmonary arrest and died in my arms. I was 37 years old that time. He left me, with 2 teenaage kids. That moment i don't know what to do, i don't know how to start. I'd been so depressed... Cried a lot, fells like the end of the world. But Good thing that my family and friends are so supportive of me. Most especially my mom, she always remind me, that i have two kids that needs my love and care, that i have to continue and move on for them. Yeah, i know it's so difficult. I asked forgiveness from my kids for not being a mom for a short time, that i forgot that they need me also. I admit, that i am so selfish that time... I am focused on my emotions and my loss... I forgot that my kids felt same way too. Everyday was a struggle for us, living a life without a great in our lives. But everyday is a learning process. We became more closer and open to each other. Now my kids are like my good friends, we had good times, shared secrets, shared paasion and have fun together. They are matured enough and open-minded individuals. This April is my husband's 4th year death anniversay. Looking back, we lived a different life. We both know that we can have a complete family. I work hard to give my kids bright future, make our lives better. And made them feel that we are still whole family. I know, its a bit scary being a single parent to teenage kids nowadays, but i know that God is guiding us. I teach them to be responsible and we'll support and love each other. Just the three of us... My kids inspires me to be who I am. The lost of our dear partner is not the end of our world. I know that my late husband is so happy and proud of me, seeing how i raised our kids. I know you can do it also. Let God be the center of our faith. We know that He will provide our needs. Have faith my friend, you too will overcome all those adversities. Be strong and look after to your kids, they are your inspirations. Don't give up... Pray always... God is always there...